Wyatts World

2012 A Time Of Peace

2012-01-10T22:37:00.000Z

Happy new year to all!!!

How was every ones Christmas? Mine was pretty cool. I have decided that this year as a resolution I'm going read 26 books this year. Which is one every 2 weeks. I finished my first one yesterday so am well on my way to achieving this goal.

I read Agatha Christie's Poirot 'The Mysterious Affair At Styles' It was pretty good but i found it hard to get into at first.

My next read is going to be a re-read of The Hunger Games so I have it fresh in my memory for the film.

Does anyone have any recommendations for books at all?

Funny man films

2011-11-13T21:38:00.001Z

I have been rating funny man films lately and of the ones i have rated the one that wins is 'Just go with it' with Adam Sandler and Jennifer Aniston.

Now personally this is not the best film of the bunch, Anchorman i think is my favourite, however it had reasonable scores in the catergorys of which were:

Funny Man
Hot Babe
Goffy Best Friend
Animal
Comedy death (Props to Zoolander for this one)
Poo Gag
Willy Gag
Overall Plot
Graphic Design (IE dvd cover and such)
Bodily Fluids
Intelligent Child
Slap Stick
and Guest Stars.

the films we have rated thus far are:

Going Overboard
Zoolander
50 First Dates
School Of Rock
Borat
Meet the fockers
Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Anchorman
Wedding Crashers
Funny people (Really bad)
40 Year Old Virgin
Due Date
The Hangover
Knocked Up
Just Go With It

What are your thoughts on these films, which is your favourite.

CASH experience

2011-11-08T23:22:00.001Z

My experience with Mentors CASH system is somewhat less then my experience with Alarm Master. At my new job we use CASH and i do quite like it. I think at the moment I am still somewhat just used to alarm master.

Anyway my experience is along a similar thing as AM I have used the call function a fair bit, Logging service visits and call outs. Added plenty new contracts to the database and have worked out the MK query master thing to generate a decent list of overdue services. One thing I have been using on CASH more then AM is the mail merge feature with regards to job sheets. We use plain carbon paper and print our service sheets through CASH which I quite like.

We have been having a couple BIG issues with the CASH system, predominantly due to a good few years of not using it properly. I am hoping to resolve these when we get the new version disk.

I find the site details page quite nice with plenty of sub tabs. The cabinet is very useful and while I do realise this is there on AM, I never used it but feel that this is definitely something I would, if I ever had to use AM again.

I think CASH is a more complicated bit of software and as such I get the impression it is 'better' then AM. I air quote better as I feel that it depends on the company and what you want from the software.

I learnt a lot more about AM as I had a personal copy on my laptop, so I could play around with it at home a little. I don't have this facility with CASH.

I think one thing i want to compare quite a bit is the whole Preventative Maintenance side to these two systems. So I'll do that in the next few days.

James Shepherd

Horses

2011-11-04T21:07:00.002Z

I just had a lovely 20 minute stroke with the horse in the field across the way. I just got back from taking Laura to choir and the fireworks were going off. The horse came over when he saw me which was lovely.

Tomorrow I am going to watch Tintin and have a Pizza and then watch some fireworks somewhere it'll be nice.

I don't have much else to say really.

CASH vs Alarm Master

2011-10-31T11:00:00.000Z

At my old company we used the software program alarm master the manage our alarm contracts. At my new job we use CASH.

I'm going do a few blog posts comparing the two. First off let me say that I am no expert on either of these programs and have pretty much taught myself. Also I have had more experience with Alarm Master and so will probably be more biased in favour of it over CASH.

This blog is going to give an overview of my experience with Alarm Master, then soon I will follow it up with my use of CASH followed by some comparison blogs.

So with Alarm Master I got quite involved in this during my last year at my old job. We only used AM for keeping track of when services were due and to keep the basic contract info. We had paper files for each account in a filing cabinet. We did not use any accounts interaction, or use the correspondence facility or the specification, items, stock or any of that. However I did learn how to do specifications with AM utilizing the items and stock database. I got it so that I could just click the items and the text segments and order them in the right way and it would produce a pretty good and more importantly professional specification. I also worked out how to use the mail merge feature of my own back, however this was something that never got used.

The preventative maintenance part of alarm master is really good and we had that so it gave you all the information you needed to write on the engineers sheet when you booked a service. It popped up with a box with notes in it, such as when a battery is due and the CS number.

I feel I am fairly competant with the basics of AM and get a few calls from my old job asking me how to do something on the system. I should really start charging for that :)

So I have just covered what I am experienced with, with regards to AM and I'll do a post in the next few days about my experience with CASH.

What experiences do other people have with Alarm Master? Do you have a preference with it over CASH?

Dead Space 2

2011-10-31T04:00:00.000Z

I recently got this game from Lovefilm and am currently half way through it. It follows on from the first game which I really enjoyed. The thing with sequels is that they have the potential to go completely of track or change something critical about the gameplay that just ruins the game. Thankfully Dead Space 2 hasn't done this and its the same game mechanics just a different storyline.

I would say Dead Space is basically Resident Evil in space with aliens. Which works really well. It is pretty horrific sometimes, like when you die.

Its not a very difficult game, well not on medium difficulty anyway. Hardcore sounds very difficult from what I have read about it.

I'm finding this whole review thing kinda difficult to do right now. I think I'm just very tired. So I think i'll leave it there.

Scantronic 9751 vs Texecom Premier Range

2011-10-29T23:52:00.000+01:00

I have been meaning to start writing blogs about my work for quite a while. I recently started a new job. My job is installing intruder alarms and at my old company we used the Scantronic brand of control panels, predominantly the 9751.

The 9751 Is a very good system. We never had any problems with them and they really suited our purpose at the company down south. They were good because they had a built in communicator and they came with a keypad. The panels were pretty small which was both good and bad. It was good because they look really neat after installation but it was a bit of a squeeze if you have a few cables in there. Using the upload/download software is good for alarms if you have a big system. However the 9751 does not have a local facility to do this. Expansion capabilities were limited on the 9751. You could only have 2 expander's making a total of 24 zones. Up to 4 keypads. They were very cost effective to purchase as well.

At my new work we use Texecom Premier panels exclusively.

I really like them now that I have used them a fair bit. One of my biggest issues is that the keypads have zones in them. I have always felt that on a new install all cables should go back to a central point and everything should have its own cable. No daisy chaining. Now with the zones on keypads I feel its very easy to get comfortable just using those zones for local sensors. This to me seems a haphazard and less tidy way of doing things. The panels do not come with either a keypad or any communications, you have to buy them separate and they work out to be more expensive then the Scantronic range. The expansion capabilities are much better. As said you have the zones in the keypad and you can have many expander's depending on the panel you get from the range. The expander's are much better looking and also have more in them. They have a speaker output and are easier to work with, having 2 12v auxiliary terminals really helps when you are filling up an 8 zone expander with sensors requiring a 12v supply. Another thing I believe the Texecom range has over Scantronic is that there range of keypads are better looking and also have the flush mount kit for there elite range. Scantronic do not.

My summary is that both panels have good and bad points and if it was my choice I would use the Scantronic panel for smaller domestic properties and the Texecom range for anything commercial and also larger domestic properties.

I believe it is important to not limit yourself to one type of control panel. At my old job we never really used to do takeovers without upgrading the control panel. The last 2-3 years I was there we did a lot more. This was due to me becoming the only alarm engineer on the company and as I like my job I got into finding out how these older panels worked and taking the time to find the manuals. I feel I have a very good range of knowledge of alarm panels. I feel I am very adept at both the Scantronic range and the Texecom range and that I have garnered a rather impressive knowledge base of other panels. I'll be the first to admit there's always more to learn and I'm looking forward to doing just that.

Hopefully I'll do more work related blogs in the future.

Broken Silence

2011-10-29T01:37:00.001+01:00

Just went to a Goodnight Astor show it was pretty awesome. I mean there was no dry ice but having a drummer was pretty cool.

I had a few bevvy's tonight which I haven't done in a while. I stuck to the Becks Vier. Despite how much aahwww llikkee stella!

Craft fair tomorrow hopefully get a lot of sales.

Will do my blog on Dead space 2 soon.

Harry Potter

2011-10-29T01:00:00.000+01:00

I got Lego Harry Potter for my birthday back in August.

Cover, isn't Ron hilarious.

I have always liked the Lego games and have wanted Harry Potter since it came out. I find the Lego games really fun and easy to play, not that they are easy to complete some bits of it are quite difficult and very frustrating.

I really like the cut scenes in the Lego games they are done without any voices and are always hilarious.

I haven't got past book 1 yet as I haven't had much time to play it.

Also coming up soon is the Wizarding Winter Fair which I will be going to. It's in my new home-town of Macclesfield and is going to be a really good Christmas event with crafts and wizard rock. I am writing a quiz for it, it's going to be along the same difficultness of my Doctor Who quiz posted a few posts ago.

I went to Sweden recently for a wizard rock show called Wrockeborg I posted a very brief and probably gibberish blog last week. Its basically just some keywords from the weekend. It was a really good weekend and I did do a proper write up for the show which should be posted on the www.wizardrock.co.uk website soon enough.

I have just checked Pottermore and not much has changed since I was there last, duelling is still not working, potions take ages to do. I did fill in the questionnaire thing, so that was cool. It was supposed to open 3 weeks ago to the general public but they seem to be running quite late. I don't I haven't been impressed with Pottermore as much as I was hoping. Maybe I was expecting too much. Hopefully there will be some new stuff to keep people around for longer.

I'm going to do a blog in a few days on a game I got off of lovefilm recently that I have been enjoying.

Wrockeborg

2011-10-20T22:59:00.002+01:00

In the spirit of Even Privet Drive by the Pumpkin Pasties.

Landvetter, Korsvagen, hill, Quality Hotel Panorama, Elvira,Moose, Seals, Penguins, Wizard pennies, funny man down the hill, 75 krona beer, Flapper Dopad, Ploop, Dry ice, Lockharts Beundrarpost, Wetherby the pygmy puff. Pastiesof pumpkins, Siriusly Hazza P, Solitary Snape, WaddiWazi, There was a magicschool and mcgonagol a sneaky snake and a raven fly a lion a badger (or beaver)a crazy Dumbledore nananananana, Dödsrelikerna,Gott Gott Gott and Blandatt, Estrella, Estelia, Universium, CHASE ME,Monkeys!!!, Wildberries I think I love you except you are Fanta and not verynice, No handle mugs, im a vampire and I truly love garlic, Wrockeborg, Louise,Romilda Vane and the chocolate cauldrons, Feather Boas not the constrictorkind, although we did see one, probably, midnight Mcdonalds hunting, Elvirasmomma was nice. Drunk swedes on trams, Is Scandinavia in Europe, Swedishmillion pound drop! Red trousers, Cab party, Laura doing a Joe DeGeorge with akeyboard only better. Broken Bass, YAM!!!, Moose Meatballs, Hotel Brekkie,Exotic Juice, Scream Eggs,

Tack & Hey Dor

New Design

2011-10-19T07:25:00.002+01:00

You may have noticed I redecorated. It currently looks pretty bad.

I have to go to work now so will look at it tonight. I think I want to start doing a few more blogs about games and such, I don't know we'll see if i follow through.

I went to Sweden at the weekend for a Wrock show. It was pretty awesome and will be doing a write up for it over at the wizardrock.co.uk blog at some point this week.

So yeah check back later tonight and hopefully this'll be all pretty :)

Elizabethan England

2011-10-03T21:41:00.000+01:00

My blog titles are all book titles from the book shelve in front of me.

This is not my bookshelf, clearly. Im sitting here waiting to play Harry Potter Lego.

Im a little bored. Im a lot tired. I applied to be on a couple quiz shows today just for the lols. A while back I applied to be on The Apprentice and got through the application stage to the audition stage. Unfortunantly i was unable to attend the interview. That would have been a lot of fun.

I had an audit at work today which went a lot better then I was expecting. Which was nice.

I think I'm done here for today. Early night for me.

Kurt Cobain commited suicide

2011-09-21T21:59:00.000+01:00

Or so I'm told.

I went horse riding recently and found it very nice my horse was called Carrie and was just like me not phased by anything and very calm.

Work is going very well at the moment im really enjoying it I am doing more in the office then I did in my old job. Its quite nice. I do miss doing the odd house bashing and such, most of our work is commercial.

I like getting emails from people who used to be such an integral part of my life. It makes me feel all warm inside lol.

Think to your past. Remember these people cause they will remember you.

xxx

Russian Imperial Family

2011-09-09T22:47:00.000+01:00

I have nothing to blog about.
Can someone give me a topic to talk about on my next blog please?

Portugal

2011-09-04T23:16:00.001+01:00

As some of you may be aware I have spent the week in Portugal working. I flew out early on Tuesday morning and basically have been working since I got here.

It has been really good work wise in that I am doing what I enjoy. We are in a relatively nice hotel and we don’t have to pay for any meals or anything.

The work has been on a really big villa on the south Portugal coast, in the Algarve. There are like 5 golf courses within about ten minutes of the job its insane. We went to Villamoura today which was nice it was very hot though and we didn’t I need to go to bed as I am nodding off here. Ill post some pictures here when I get back.

James

DOCTOR WHO QUIZ!!!

2011-09-01T23:24:00.001+01:00

As some of you may be aware i went to the Doctor Who cottage several weeks back. While I was there I orchestrated a pretty decent Doctor Who quiz which was pretty hard and as such the group of us that went to THE DOCTOR WHO cottage only bested at approxamately 60-70%. I therefore post the quiz here for anyone and everyone to attempt themselves, no cheating!
Bonus points for any funny answers

1: Which two versions of K-9 do we see in the episode ‘School Reunion’?
2: In ‘The Girl In the Fireplace’ what was the persons name, not title,that the robots were travelling through time to find?
3: In which sport did Rose Tyler win a bronze medal in competition?
4: Which Earth based organization was the doctor a member of?
5: At what time does Roger’s alarm keep going off in ‘Partners In Crime’?
6: In what year was the ‘Unquiet Dead’ set?
7: in which episode does the doctor first open the tardis by clicking his fingers?
8: Where was River Song born?
9: What were the fish like creatures in ‘The Doctors Daughter’ called?
10: Where was Donna Noble working when she met the doctor?
11: What was Sally Sparrows friend called?
12: In which year did the doctor and Martha get sent to in Blink by the weeping angels?
13: Which OTHER companion visited Rose several time as a child?
14: What was the name of the substance placed at the top of the empire state building in ‘Daleks In Manhatten’?
15: The Archangel network consisted of how many satelites in stationary orbit around the Earth?
16: Which mood drug killed the entire upper population of New New York?
17: What gift does the doctor give Jabe of the forest of Cheem in ‘ The End Of The World’?
18: What is the name of the 3 witches in ‘The Shakespeares Code’?
19: What was the name of the doctors horse in ‘The Girl In The Fireplace’?
20: During ‘The Runaway Bride’ we saw the Tardis do what for the very first time?
21: What was the name of John Smiths love interest?
22: How does the doctor stop the magnetic overload on the MRI machine in ‘Smith and Jones’?
23: What was contained within the Genesis Ark?
24: The Tardis is powered by what?
25: Who is the first character to appear in the very first episode of the ’new’ Doctor Who?
26: Why did Donna kiss the Doctor?
27: What date did Rose’s father die?
28: What was the name of the first human outpost on Mars?
29: Whic music artist did the doctor get to play at the winter frost fair at the Thames in 1814 for River Songs birthday?
30: What does the acronym C.A.L. stand for in ‘Silence In The Library’?
31: From the doctors viewpoint who are the four contacts on screen during ‘The Stolen Earth’?

Pottermore: Pets, Wand and Houses.

2011-08-29T11:33:00.001+01:00

I got my Pottermore email over the weekend and dutifully dove back into the world of Harry Potter. I really like all the artwork and the layers within the moments that focus different parts of the picture.
The three main things on Potter that are the main identity issues are your pet your wand and your house.
With your pet, you simply pick the pet you want from between an owl a cat and a toad. I didn’t really want an owl as i imagined everyone would be getting them. (which from peoples avatars is a fairly accurate assessment) So I looked at all the pictures of the animals and I found that I really liked the Natterjack Toad which I have literally just decided to call Spingle.
Next up was the wand. Naturally you didn’t get to pick your wand. I really liked all the information on wand cores, wood, length and flexibility. To get your wand you were asked some multiple choice questions, the questions don’t have any obvious answers to get certain wand traits which i liked. I ended up getting a Supple Apple Wood wand with a length of 12 and a half inches and a Dragon Heartstring core. I really liked the definition of my wand and feel the characteristics are very good and while they may not reflect my characteristics, I don’t think that is the point of the wand. It has its own personality and I really like mine.
When you finally get to the school you get sorted. This has and was always going to create a lot of debate with people as some people obviously won’t get the house that they want or think they should be in. I have always felt more of an affinity with Slytherin personally, however as practically everyone else in the world who knows me thinks of me as a Hufflepuff I was in no way shocked to find i got Hufflepuff. While Hufflepuff is not my house of choice i embrace the role and always considered it to be my second choice. I will not be “cheating” to get the house I want. I believe that we all have traits of all the houses and we don’t necesarilly know what is best for us. With regards to Dumbledores famous quote about choices, which I expect will be quoted infinately in the sorting process, i just think that people should embrace were they were put. No one ever got resorted at Hogwarts and we are playing the role of a Hogwarts student. Two examples of choices involving the sorting hat are the famous HP himself who was a hatstall between Slytherin and Gryffindor. Yet the hat put him in Gryffindor now you might argue that it was because he vehemently didn’t want Slytherin which is probably the contributing factor. I also think that the character of the sorting hat would also have heard the not Slytherin comment and wanted to make Harry think about it properly and see if he in anyway changed his mind. The sorting hat said harry could be great and Slytherin would help him on his way. I think the hat wanted to clarify to harry the actual traits of Slytherin and as it could see in his head it would know if its Slytherin summary had any affect on Harrys decision which im guessing it didn’t. I also think the sorting hat may have just been playing a little and i just over analysed it.
So with Neville thanks to pottermore we now know that he was desperate to be in Hufflepuff which was his choice BUT the hat insisted on putting him in Gryfindor. I think the story would have been very different had he not been in Gryffindor. He didn’t know what was best for him the hat did, it saw his huge potential and placed it in the house best suited to bring it out of him. Note that I did not say the best house, as its not all the houses have huge potential. The wizard who discovered the magical properties behind the number 7 was in fact a Hufflepuff. I think maybe what pottermore could do is ask us what house we believe we should be in, and maybe factor that in a very tiny amount in there calculations so if someone is a hatstall it will then push a certain house.
All in all i like it a lot i do think there needs to be more interactive stuff to do between the books. I think wizard chess will be a huge thing to do as i would say the majority of people who go on pottermore would likely enjoy a good game of chess.
I’m very disappointed to find that people are all ready cheating to get house points with the potions.

New Job

2011-08-20T14:16:00.000+01:00

I started a new job on Tuesday and its going really well. I have been doing different things then normal, we did a PA system which I have never done before. It went well and was interesting. I am going to learn a lot at this new job and am really looking forward to some of the things they do.

I went to Leaky last month which was good I did a blog about that over at the wizardrock.co.uk/wordpress blog. We also spent a nice weekend at the Doctor Who cottage in Lydd which was nice here is a picture. :)

Hope everyone is good and ill try to blog more. What has everyone else been up to this summer?

Paperwork

2011-04-20T21:04:00.001+01:00

I have just spent the last 5 hours finding installation manuals for various intruder alarm panels. I install them for a living and got sucked into a few websites. I like having the manuals on my computer just in case i get problems.

Wow this is really boring.
I am also watching the Arsenal and Tottenham game on the TV,its been a pretty good game so far with lots of goals.
Tomorrow is the start of the easter holidays and i have Laura coming down for a whole ten days which is gonna be pretty awesome. The weather is supposed to be really nice which im looking forward to.

Thats about it really. Maybe some exciting news soon Ill keep you posted.

Hope everyone is well please leave me a comment telling me what the most exciting thing you have ever done has been?

RTT

2011-04-05T23:15:00.000+01:00

Remember the time when i made up some characters for the Firefly verse?

Today i made a new one. He is kinda a recurring character in my series and has interesting connections to my crew. I really want to write this thing at some point. The trouble is i have issues actually putting it down on paper. i know what i want to happen and how.

I have a few more character ideas that i need to fill out and make up properly. I mean they pretty much make themselves.

Also i really need to go to a youtube gathering soon. When is the next one if anyone knows let me know please! :)

Where does time go?

2011-03-28T20:52:00.001+01:00

Its amazing how much my life has changed since i started this blog. Allthough i guess really not that much, i guess its more me that has changed. Or have i?

I started writing this and was like oh i've changed loads then started thinking wait no you haven't. I think i just confused myself.

I'm really excited to be going up to scotland in a couple of weeks to see Neil for his birthday. I'll also get to see Lauren again which is always a great thing. I just read a couple old posts and its interesting to note how relationships with people have changed since i started this blog over 2 years ago.

I spoke to my brother on the phone today for a while because i hadn't spoke to him in a while. That was really cool we spoke about computers and his love life. He has more of a love life then i ever did or have done and he's only 13!

I have a money box from when i was a child on my desk its a royal guard, one of the ones with the big black hats. Its pretty cool and currently contains actual money! not much but still.

Also my sister has started her own mobile nail technician if anyone is interested.

I don't know i just wanted a blog in March so here you go :) enjoy.

I know why dont you tell me something about yourself that i don't know? Go on do it!! :-)

A man's worth is not measured by the size of his biceps

2011-02-22T21:16:00.000Z

I started this blog a few days ago but could not think of what to talk about. But basically the thing was going to be about people who think that because they are 'hard' that they have a right to push people around and such. Anyway i have since moved on from that topic but i like the saying.

I feel so many differnt things right now.

Scared, guilty, happy, excited, nervous, brave, loved, missed, oh so tired.

So much is happening. Good things, great things, expensive things. BIG things. Ill tell more when i know more.

: }

Blogger stats

2011-02-17T20:26:00.000Z

I love looking at the blogger stats. Its very interesting like i just looked and i had 9 pageviews today. 7 from germany 1 from poland and 1 from the us. Predominantly the majority of my pageviews appear to be from the US. I find this interesting. Probabloy because i am a loser :)

Anyway in all seriousness its probably because my friends in the US have less other contact with me. I have no doubt that i know each and every reader i have personally. I like that thought. I mean my primary reason for blogging is because i like to go back and read blogs. I like reading about how i felt and sometimes i put things in some of my blogs that only mean things to me. Like one has a number title. its about 20 digits long but it actually means something to me. :) i honestly doubt anyone would ever know what it is unless i tell them. Its like my little secret. ;-)

Also sometimes things i write only mean things to certain people who probably read this, or not but... i'm rambling arent i anyway i like blogging.

Oh i was also gonna say that sometimes i forget what the little personal things mean and i wonder what the hell i was doing that for lol Its fun to try and rememeber though.

Short and sweet

2011-02-13T20:17:00.000Z

Oh what a noble distiguished collection of fine little friends you have made
hitting the tables without you again no we'll wait no we promise we'll wait
june makes these excellent sewing machines out of common industrial waste
she spends a few months at a time on the couch
but she's safe she wears shades she wears shades
oh but no one can stare at the wall as good as you my baby doll
and you're racist for playing along
you're only human after all
and youre learning that just 'cause they call themselves friends
doesnt mean they'll call
they made the comment and just
but youve got the needle I guess that's the point of it all

maybe a week in the tropics would help to remind you how nice life can be
we propped you right up in a chair on the deck with a beautiful view of the sea
but a couple days later we came back and you and the chair were nowhere to be seen
you had magically moved to the closet eyes fixed on the spot where the dryer had been
oh yes no one can stare at the wall as good as you my baby doll
and youre racist for playing along
youre almost human after all
why on earth would I keep you locked up in here where you so love the fall
well the patterns laid out on the bed
with hundreds of colors of thread
but youve got the needle I guess that's the point in the end

it's better to waste your life watching the scenery change at a comatose rate
and to put yourself in and turn into one of those cigarette ads that you hate
and while you were sleeping some men came around and said they had some dementions to take
i'm not sure what they were talking about but they sure a mess of your face
but still no one can stare at the wall as good as you my baby doll
and you're racist for coming along you're almost human even now
and just cause they call themself experts doesnt mean that they'll call
oh they've got the permanent price and the homes with a stable address
and they've got excitement and life by the fistful but you've got the meaning
i guess that's the point of it all

Quite a long song today. I have been listening to this a little lately its a really good song. I had a lovely Valentines weekend with my girlfriend. She made me awesome heart shape cupcakes :)

Im gonna go drive fast cars and kill insects. Not at the same time :) Ill probably review both games in the next few days.

Art

2011-02-09T19:42:00.000Z

When i was younger i never had any real interest in art. I appreciate pictures and such but never really put any thought into it and certainly never analysed them.

The last year or 2 even 3 i have gained a MUCH greater understanding and appreciation of the artistic world. I would say it started the time i went to an art exhibit with a bunch of youtubers in 2008. It was a gathering organized by Paul AKA Cheekychen on Youtube. It was a small exhibit during London art week. I went mainly because i like Youtube gatherings but it was really interesting and they had a lot of cool stuff there. I then began looking more into cheekychens work on youtube which is fantastic and would occasionally look into other peoples videos and art. I remember one stop animation video which was like chalk drawings on a wall and the drawings changed shape and moved all around the city it was so cool and must have taken so long to do.

Cheeky chen was part of a website called tailcast at the time and i joined up and began commenting on various peoples paintiungs and photography it was a really cool site with a great emphasis on community. The site has changed a lot since then and doesnt seem to focus on the community side so much anymore. Anyway i found some more great people on there and not only did it have art and photography but also writing, poems and storys.

I contribuited to the site a little and even did a few pictures but i mostly did some poetry. i think ill edit this post with links to pictures tonight. Writing is no longer avaliable on tailcast and i dont know what has happened to the stuff i wrote. Sad times :(

Moving on i was never a 'regular' at the site and would frequent once or twice a month and have a browse. I mean thats basically the extent of my artistic interest but its still better then being completely ignorant of the artistic world.

I started this this morning and have only just now got back to it not too sure which direction i was going so i'll wing it, dont you guys just love it when i do that.

So i talked about tailcast and cheekychen mostly. Moving on there is another artist who i am a big fan of that i also met via youtube and that is Jonny AKA thekingofdefford. He does a lot of really good pencil artwork mostly figures. Mostly popular figures, celebritys and what not. He also does paintings and is a good photographer. I recently looked at his stuff again which is what inspired me to do this blog actually. Most recently he now has his own website at www.TKD-art.com where he sells stuff and showcases his work. On top of all that he is a really good guy and me and him spent a day in london once having a right good gossip and catch up.

Youtube has played a lot less part in my life the last year, something i do plan to go back to this year. However i do have some lovely pieces of art that mny girlfriend has done for me in the last year that i love and have hanging up in my room. I have a big frame that i am going to be putting all the smaller items in as one big collage type thing.

I was working at a BMW dealership the other day. On the wall in the showroom they had a picture it was basically a segment of a floor that had been driven over and the tyre tracks were different colours. It was very cool.

I seem to have clearly lost the overall flow of this blog post and shall end it here.
I guess what i am writing about is that i have become a lot more aware and appreciative of art in the last couple years.

Yeah thats all folks :)

Lovefilm and RUA

2011-02-06T20:38:00.000Z

Open your eyes I see
Your eyes are open
Wear no disguise for me
Come into the open

When it’s cold outside
Am I here in vain?
Hold on to the night
There will be no shame

Always, I wanna be with you
And make believe with you
And live in harmony,
harmony oh love

Melting the ice for me
Jump into the ocean
Hold back the tide I see
Your love in motion

When it’s cold outside
Am I here in vain?
Hold on to the night
There will be no shame

I really hope someone knows where the lyrics for todays post are from.

Life is becoming very interesting lately and i am thinking about the future lots. I havent really done anything today except play computer games. Thats a small hint for the above song ;-)

I should really start doing reviews here because i watch a lot of films and play a lot of games. Its all thanks to Lovefilm. I get games and films from it so i feel i have to watch them as soon as i get them to make it worth it.

The real good thing is computer games though. Computer games are very expensive these days and being able to rent them for as long as i like is great and definantly worth it.=

I guess ill do a review of a couple things.

I recently got DARK VOID from Lovefilm. Its a pretty good game.Its no classic but its just a really simple and fun game. Like many popular games at the moment it is a FPS. The main thinkg i really like is that its not TOO hard. I find a lot of FPS are extremly diffucult these days. I expect its because people are so ridiculously good at them these days. However the market for a good FPS for a casual gamer isnt quite as good. Most FPS namely Call of duty are online centric which is NEVER a good place for a casual gamer to get his FPS kicks. The single player on them is still very good but due to the core target audience of such games as Call Of Duty, the campaigfn are still gennerally difficult. With Dark Void it just plain fun. The graphics aren't as good as COD but i think it works. If the graphics were on par with call of duty it wouldn't give the impression of a fun simple game.

One aspect of the game that is really fun is the jet pack. You get to fly around and perform aerial manuvours. You can 'Hijack' enemy aircraft and such.

The storyline is also quite casual. Its a sci-fi story centered around the bermuda triangle. The cutscenes arent too long, or necessary to watch. All in all its just a very fun easy game to play. I completed it on casual difficulty which was very simple but still rewarding. I then started hardcore because i wanted to get the trophy. I got about half way through and sent it back to lovefilm. I kinda wish i hadnt and i will probably get it again at somepoint to get the few trophys i still need to get and just to relive the fun.

Recently i also got the film "I Could Never Be Your Woman" Its a rom com featuring Michelle Pfeiffer and Paul Rudd. I am going through a bit of a Paull Rudd phase at the moment. My man-crush aside its a pretty good film Its a lot like the game above simple, fun and enjoyable. The basic plot is older woman and younger man get involved and as in life certain things come up. This isnt a proper review but it'll do because i need to go.

I need a suit!

2011-01-23T21:59:00.000Z

I really dont know what to write about. Its kinda late and i have had such a lovely weekend with Laura. I'm probably gonna watch a film in bed in a minute.

The Neighbours cat keeps coming in our house!
We went for a lovely walk today around Kerridge.
I want to go horse riding soon.
I have a busy year this year.
March is gonna be good.
I do like a good chocolate croissant.
I got the MPG up to 41.1 on my way home today so yay for saving money.
CLICK!!
I'm gonna watch did you hear about the morgans because i got it on lovefilm the other day and i don't want it to just sit here for ages and not get watched :)

See ya, ill think of something decent to write tomorrow :)

Resident Evil Afterlife

2011-01-20T18:49:00.000Z

I watched this film last night and was a little disappointed in it. The action was very good but i feel it lacked any kind of decent storyline. This was the 4th film in the series based on the popular computer game series.

As for the computer games i think they may have run there course aswell, Number 1 and 2 were really good, i never got into any of the others until Resident Evil 4 (they had multiple side resident evil games aswell as number 3) Resident Evil 4 was brilliant however it was only really any decent on the Wii. I think he motion sensor controls were perfect for the game. I didnt like resident evil 5 much however i do plan on trying it again when i get my hands on a motion sensor for the PS3, which will be a long time coming.

I recently deleted my tailcast account. It used to be a good site with brilliant art and writing but now it is just for art and really heavy on the whole make your own cards and posters and such. It seems to be a lot less community based now and a lot more commercial.

Not really any direction in this blog. I guess i'll leave it for today. I just feel a bit lethargic really. This weekend is gonna be awesome though!

2010

2011-01-18T07:00:00.003Z

Things i did last year that were amazing!!!

Well Top of the list is the fact that i fell in love (Sappy i know :)
I went to a model village
I went to Cork and saw a brilliant Wizard Rock show with 3 amazing bands.
The 2010 Snow Ball was pretty amazing too :)
2 Road trips to Scotland AGAIN!
Baked Cookies in Ireland :)
Baked a Cake, and neither were half bad either.
Learnt to cook a lot more
Went to a lovely Victorian town.
Learnt a lot about the beatles.
Was a roadie in the pouring rain in London.
Christmas was pretty awesome this year.
Rode a bike for the first time in ages. Will do this lots more in the summer :)

Im SURE there is more but its late Ill put this on a timed post so its on a different day :)

A happy Human

2011-01-17T22:33:00.000Z

Its been so long since i last even looked at blogger, let alone wrote one. God knows what everyone has been writing about.

I just got of the phone to a good friend of mine whom i hadn't spoke to in a long while. I was looking around Facebook a little and i just wanted to say how happy i am with my life right now i have a fantastic Girlfriend who means the world to me and a great group of friends.

I haven't spoken to many of them lately because i am somewhat of a bad friend. Sorry. I think i am going to try and be more communicative this year i definantly want to make it to a couple of Youtube gatherings this year as i didn't get to any last year. I enjoy them and its always nice to meet people.

anyway im just rambling. I dont even have twitter to pimp this out on anymore. I really like the diary feeling of a blog though and while there may be things i don't necesary put in here because it is public its nice to go back and read some blogs sometimes.

I guess i have a lot to talk about really i could drone on for a few pages about the snowball and christmas and other things i have been doing but i will sign off for now and try and be a bit more regular with my blogs.

:)

"The wave works to correct itself" and other philosophical musings.

2010-12-13T18:59:00.000Z

I recently re-read a book series i love called the Death Gate Cycle. This isnt gonna be a review or anything but it made me think a lot about right, wrong, actions, consequences, reasons for actions, karma and generally life.

Late in the series The Wave came into it and basically the wave is about how for everything bad there is an opposing force to balance it. Im not quite sure how to put down what i have been thinking. Also there are self proclaimed "gods" in the book but they are not really gods. It talks about how we are all gods. How we each and everyone of us has the power to influence the universe. How we are all part of the wave and a single drop causes ripples. For good or bad. Hitler did not do all the bad things on his own. He sparked an idea and took the lead with it but he could not have done it alone he started the wave but he didnt maintain it alone.

The good things in the world are the same. Someone has a thought and sparks a revelotion. I struggle to think of anything of the top of my head. erm... Womens sufferage discuss.

It just made me think how we are all powerful we influence peopls lives everyday. Whether its a small act of kindness or being rude to someone.

I realise none of this is exactly new to the world or even me for that matter i guess i just never really sat and THOUGHT about it properly.

Have a wonderful day x

Final Fantasy XIII

2010-11-11T17:56:00.000Z

I wake in the morning tired of sleeping
Get in the shower and make my bed alone
I put on my makeup talking to the mirror
Ready for a new day without you

And I walk steady on my feet, I talk, my voice obeys me
I go out at night, sleep without the lights
And I do all of the things I have to keeping you off my mind
But when I think I'll be alright I am always wrong 'cause

I have always been a huge fan of the final fantasy series, well ever since i played FFVII many moons ago. It was a pure RPG with such a fantastic storyline, not to mention it was groundbreaking with its graphics. I liked that you had levels and each person was suited to different tasks. The magic system was just the best i have seen before and after. I liked the turnbased battles. I liked the leveling system. It had amazing characters who had personalitie and character. I liked that you could rename the characters.

In this day and age with computer companys seemingly more concerned with graphics and appealing to a wider audience, i feel like FFXIII was a HUGE let down. I had been waiting for years for this game to come out on the PS3. I had felt that FFVIII was a step down in gameplay while a step up in grahics. FFIX seemed to be somewhere in the middle of 7 and 8. I played both these games and i still really liked them but they did not match the appeal of 7. With FFX I felt that they had hit another really good game. On par with 7. The graphics were so much better (Obviously being like 5 years later). The characters again were very dynamic and the battle system while being slightly less turnbased, it still worked. I really liked the levelling system. All the little extras that you could spend hours doing before the final boss were really good. I thouroughly enjoyed X. I never played XI as it was an online only game and i like playing the games at my own pace and such. they then released FFX2 which was a sequel (well thats obvious) to X. I never expected this to be a proper RPG but i got the game and because i knew the characters and such i enjoyed it. It wasnt your typical RPG at all. FFXII was ooookkkay but lacked a bit of the X factor (Yes i did :).
The the anticipation and longwaiting till FFXIII.

I dont like the leveling system it is far too guided and somewhat irrelevant to the game. The battle system is just far too actiony and hack and slashy. I dont like that you basically dont get to choose what actions you take and also that you only get to choose what actions the leader takes in a battle. Especially when the leader keeps changing every 20 mins. Having to switch between roles is really frustrating.

There is far too many cutscenes in the game which really detracts from the gameplay, if i wanted to watch a movie i would watch a movie. i have played about 12 hours and i would say at least 6 of that has just been sitting watching cut scenes. Sometimes you would have a 5 min cut scene and then it would go back to the game you would have 1 maybe 2 battles and then there would be another 5 min cutscene. At one point i think all i did between cutscenes was walk through a building and up some stairs.

I really dont like the way you basically dont get to explore anything you only have one way to go. There is no exploration thus far. Also there are no citys or shops or people you can interact with. You do all your shopping through a savepoint, you just click the shop and click your goods and thats it you have it. this seems to me to be a huge backward step to text based games in this instance. I think the characters are ok and to be honest i would proberbly like them a lot more if i wasnt so bored of watching all the cutscenes and i had more involvement in the development of there character, IE Roleplaying.

From what i can make out the game becomes a lot more open once you hit chapter 11. I am at chapter 8 and 13 hours into the game. its an extremly long time to get to the actual roleplaying element of the game. Im not sure i can stick it out personally.

Basically i just wanted to express my disappointm,ent in FFXIII and i hope the next one is a lot better. More roleplay please!

2500+ Emails

2010-09-19T23:04:00.001+01:00

I once had a girl,
Or should I say,
She once had me
She showed me her room,
Isn't it good,
Norwegian wood

She asked me to stay
And she told me to sit anywhere
So I looked around
And I noticed there wasn't a chair

I sat on a rug,
Biding my time,
Drinking her wine
We talked until two and
Then she said, "it's time for bed"

I just went through all my un-archived emails and filed them in there relevant folders... it was a time consuming process.

I would say the most i had from a single website/person was from my boss and the office.... Yeah lol

I really want a laptop, but i have no money and can not justify getting one even if i did.

You may have noticed this is somewhat an erratic blog post.

The blog post editor is being weird when i press enter.

Im looking for a song to go at the top....found one.

I like this beatle song a lot at the moment.

I want to start doing this again regularly...lets see how that goes.

God im tired.

I hope Forbidden planet don't make me wait till the other thing on my order is released to send me the one that is allready released.

I need a Lucreti's Revelation. Its a glove in a game i am playing on the PS3.

I miss Laura :(

I was gonna watch The Bounty Hunter on DVD at 9...that didn't happen. Damn internet.

I have been writiung and adding things to this for about 30 mins now...i should probably stop.

FIN

Rgeneration is useless

2010-08-05T18:05:00.000+01:00

Was listening to this earlier

http://www.myspace.com/themedusacascademusic

So got home and had to watch this. Just had too

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eE0e9rQVUzg

Addiction

2010-05-16T08:50:00.000+01:00

In the last 7 days i have spent over 30 hours playing Fallout 3. Thats the game my brother deleted my 30+ hour game save of last week.

I have a huge manual to read for work. We are using this new program on the computer to keep all our alarm contracts and such organized. Its really good and does loads of stuff it tells us when services are due and kicks out statistics for us on things. I mean basically its a huge database. I'm quite excited to get stuck in and sort it all out. Did i mention i'm a huge nerd for this sort of thing :)

Its early on Sunday morning and i just got woken up by my cats cause they were hungry!!

Wow this is a disjointed post.

Today i have to write a band profile for the new website that i am part of over at www.wizardrock.co.uk.

I also have to do lots of work in the garden. Yesterday we fixed the fence. Two of the panels had fallen down. I also put an outside socket at the end of the garden.
Today we are weeding and cutting grass and getting it all pretty.

I also intend to spend a good few hours on Fallout 3 :)

"This is like a tagline" Wyatthaplo 2010

2010-04-28T19:56:00.000+01:00

"She walked off the street, into his life and stole his heart." Pretty Woman (1990)

"An Adventure 65 Million Years In The Making." Jurassic Park (1993)

"Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free." The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
Incidentally this is my favourite one :)

"Cocktails first. Questions later." Swingers (1996)

"The mission is a man." Saving Private Ryan (1998)

"...look closer." American Beauty (1999)

"Intelligence is Relative" Burn After Reading (2008)

:) :)

2010-04-11T10:38:00.000+01:00

I am sitting in my friends kitchen while they are all asleep. We had a party or his birthday last night and Siriusly Hazza P performed a briliant set which was also streamed on ustream. I took the role of chat moderator and it went well. Very well in fact. I think everyone had a blast i certainly did. after the show we just hung out for the evening me neil lauren laura and cathrin listening to good music and have a few drinks. Earlier we had had a barbecue in neils garden and it was lovely. Its just been a really nice weekend hanging out with friends. Im pretty happy with life right now :) :) :) anyway im gonna go have some brekkie cause i iz hungry init lol

changing faces of social interaction.

2010-03-24T17:33:00.000Z

"Where did all the trees go?
Does anyone know?
Where did all the trees go?
They moved across the street to grow"

I have been thinking lots lately about relationships. Not just romantically but all types. Work relationships, friendships, and yes the romantic kind to.

Sometimes the lines blur between the different groups and someone you work for can grow into a friend. Also people you are friends with change into romantic relationships. Sometimes they go backwards to. Relationships are constantly changing. There are some in my life that have fallen to the wayside a little. Its not a bad thing its just how life works. Life balances generally though. Their are several relatinoships in my life that have blossomed over the past 2-3 months or so. A romance and a bro-mance :D I'm very happy with this and it kinda makes me not so sad.

Thgat total sounds like it should be an essay or something. Maybe one day ill do one :) (Yeah right, whatever you say James)

People

2010-03-12T20:47:00.000Z

"My war paint is sharpie ink and I'll show you how much my shit stinks,
And ask you what you think because your thoughts and words are powerful.
They think we're disposable, well both my thumbs opposable
Spell that on a double word and triple letter score"

"Insert rant about people"

I miss people. If you read this, i miss you. If you don't read this, I miss you. I'll be honest, some people i miss more then others. No offence. I miss you.

<3

Urges

2010-03-11T23:03:00.000Z

"Yes, you want her
Look at her you know you do
Possible she wants you too,
there is one way to ask her.
It don't take a word,
Not a single word, go on and
Kiss the Girl (sing wit' me now)"

Sometimes i get urges to do things. Good things, bad things. Drink 19 shots, cleaning at 1am. I knew it was stupid, but i wanted to do it.
Yesterday i watched District 9 and Superbad. I then, at 1am decided to clean. I washed and wiped up, put laundry on the radiaters. Folded and put away the stuff i took off the radiaters. I took the bins out. Probably woke some people. I don't know why i just felt like being productive and sort of went into auto-pilot. I probably would have done more if i had seen anything obvious.
So anyway urges, instinct. A lot of the time i like to do what my instinct tells me. it may get me into trouble sometimes but i soon learn. Even if i know it'll be bad/stupid i still do it. Why? Not really sure. I guess its the experience. i like to have the experience of things and not just go by what i am told. I really don't know what the point of this whole ramble was so i think ill stop. :)

Thoughts

2010-03-07T21:58:00.000Z

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

I have been listening to this song lots today. Its weird to think about other people having thoughts. The truth is you never really know what people are thinking. Why they do what they do, Say what they say. Even if they tell you, are they being completely 100% honest. Sometimes people don't even know why they do things or what is best for them. I guess my point is you will never 'figure' someone out. You will never know to the full extent what goes on in thier head. I don't have any advice for what to do about about this bit of information. Just sharing it :)

Maturity

2010-02-28T21:25:00.003Z

"So 1, 2, 3, take my hand and come with me
because you look so fine and i really wanna make you mine.
I say you look so fine that I really wanna make you mine."

I have done very little today. I had lots i wanted to do but just didn't get round to it. Procrastination is a terrible terrible thing. I wanted to start my Firefly roleplay thing today. I think im gonna do it in blog format.
I need to get a new screen for my computer because this 32" is far too big to have in my little study.

So to the topic. I was discussing the topic of maturity earlier and some people believe that because they are older that there opinions count for more then someone who hasn't lived as long as them. This in my opinion is bull. Just because someone is a lot younger then you doesn't mean that thier opinions count for less or that you know better because you have been around longer. Its not even that they look down on you or think they are better then you. They just don't really take your ideas and thoughts seriously. They can be patronizing to younger people that provide new and fresh ideas. Age does not always mean you know best.

I mean clearly im not a mind reader so maybe my opinons on peoples thoughts are a load of crap but i tend to get this vibe about certain people. What are your thoughts?

Happiness

2010-02-27T21:51:00.003Z

"You know I always stay up without sleepin',
And think to myself,
Where do I belong forever,
In whose arms, the time and place?"

Money. Happiness. I honestly truly believe that money will not make you happy. I mean really think about it. If you had millions what would you have? A bigger house? Who really cares?
More friends? You might question some of them and chances are some of them will be fake. Fancier clothes? Again does that really matter? Good people, the type i wish to call friends can see through the mask of fancy clothes and big houses and see people for who they are and not thier money.

I mean sure it would be nice to be financially secure, couple holidays a year, not have to work but to be perfectly honest if i didn't have to work i would get so bored. I think that is possibly were people then found other ways to entertain and pass the time. By other im thinking chemical substitutes.
I actually find happiness IN my work. I like the sense of accomplishment when i finish a job. Sometimes ill work late to get a job done because i don't want to leave it unfinished.

Don't get me wrong i have met some lovely people who are well off but quite frankly stereotypically most rich people do think they are better then everyone else. Especially those born into it. Again this is a generalization, they are not all like that.

I seem to have gone off topic a little. Anyway my point is i truly would choose love and happiness over money.

To my friends and family, you are priceless <3

Existence

2010-02-25T22:59:00.002Z

"All i know is i'm lost without you
I'm not gonna lie
How am i gonna be strong without you
I need you by my side"

Do people exist when we aren't thinking about them. When they are not in view. Is thier weight to the saying "Out of sight, out of mind".

As many people know i overthink a lot of things. My brain is usually always on the go. I think of most people everyday. Do they exist? Do my thoughts make them real? Chances are if you are reading this i think of you everyday.

Hello friends, i miss you :)

Books

2010-02-24T22:01:00.002Z

"So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words 'cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight when your asleep"

Forgot about the italics...oh well :)

Today i finished a book. The witches forest by ...i don't know...
It was an ok book. Nothing special. I started it in July. Read half the book straight off then didnt really touch it for a few months and couldnt get back into it properly. Finally finished it tonight though.

So now i have no book i am reading. Here are my choices. Pick one.

13 little blue envelopes by Maureen Johnson
A shadow on the wing by Kerry Jamieson
City of glass by Cassandra Clare
Spirit Gate by Kate Elliot
Then We Came To The End y Joshua Ferris

:)

TmusicV

2010-02-24T00:01:00.001Z

"I love the way
You make me feel
That you belong to me
I belong to you"

Be amazed if anyone gets todays song :)
Its from a tv show soundtrack.

I generally like a lot of the music people use in TV shows. A LOT of my favourite songs i have discovered through them being played in TV shows. examples:

Calling All Angels by Jane Sibbery (Charmed)
I Promise You by Judith Owen (Charmed)
How Soon Is Now by The Smiths (Charmed)
Born To Try by Delta Goodrem (Neighbours)
The Dream Must Stay Alive by The Tribe (The Tribe)
Do You Wanna Date My Avatar by The Cast (The Guild)
Where You Lead I Will Follow by Carole King/Louis Goffin (Gilmore Girls)
Lucky by Bif Naked (Buffy)
Close Your Eyes by Chris Beck (Buffy)
Pretty much the entire Dr Horrible Album :)
We Used To Be Friends by The Dandy Warhols (Veronica Mars)

This list would be a hell of a lot longer if i was doing movies too :) Also it would also be more if i wasn't tired and could remember more :)

What shall i call this post?

2010-02-22T09:00:00.003Z

"There's room at the top they are telling you still,
But first you must learn how to smile as you kill,
If you want to be like the folks on the hill,
A working class hero is something to be."

Its is exactly 9am GMT. I know this big elephants can't always use small entrances this post is on a timer for 9am GMT. I added the GMT so clever people can't be like "well no its 1am here" :)

Speaking of timers. I'd much rather use a close proximity mine to a timed mine.

Also Who decided that a game of Football should be 90 minutes long?

Hiro is the coolest reference to time that i have so enjoy this picture of the master of time and space
YATA!!!!

Busy learning

2010-02-21T20:30:00.002Z

"Elope with me Miss Private and we’ll drink ourselves awake
We’ll taste the coffee houses and award certificates
A privy seal to keep the feel of 1960's style
We’ll comment on the decor and we’ll help the passer by"

I have had such a busy weekend!

Things i learnt this weekend.

I do in fact enjoy my work quite a bit.
I have pretty good willpower
Always make sure you dot the i's and cross the t's when it comes to work.
Made presents ALWAYS trump bought stuff
I need a second quilt set
Ziva in NCIS is actually quite attractive, She no Abby though :)
I'm a pretty good employee

Wanna Cookie? Name that tune!

2010-02-19T23:37:00.003Z

"You shut your mouth
how can you say
I go about things the wrong way
I am human and I need to be loved
just like everybody else does"

Tonight i made a video, it is here . Also That is my first time putting a link in a word so lets see if that works.

I have to work tomorrow that should be fun :( Actually its probably only 3-4 hours work so its all good :)

Final thing Abby Sciuto from NCIS is pretty damn awesome!

Nap time

2010-02-18T22:35:00.004Z

"From behind these walls I hear your song
Oh, sweet words
The music that you play lights up my world
The sweetest that I've heard
Could it be that I've been touched and turned
Oh Lord, please finally, finally things are changing"

I really need to stop falling asleep in the bath. Mainly because it makes me wake up a little then im up for a few more hours. Oh yeah and something about dying. WHICH, Incidentally i don't think is possible. I think that as soon as your head goes under water your body whould wake up. Its the survival instinct kicking in :)

I fixed the italics thing by writing the post first then adding the lyrics at the end.

<3 James

...

2010-02-17T23:03:00.003Z

"Take my love, take my land
Take me where i cannot stand
I dont care, i'm still free
You can't take the sky from me"

Italics is stuck on again :(
I have decide i have a very good imagination. I was tellin Laura a story i made up earlier, and i could picture in my brain the characters like i could actually see them drawn on a piece of paper.

If only i had the ability to put them on that bit of paper.

SYTYCD and stuff

2010-02-11T22:32:00.003Z

"I'm gonna find a nice girl
Who bikes all over town
A nice girl
Who likes having me around"

Today is Thursday. Apperently i can't turn the italics off :(

Anyway, I don't have anything to talk about. I have been working my arse off all week. We got a completion date on the mortgage today. As of the 22nd of this month i will be a homeowner. Complete with falling down garden fence...thats about the only actual thing that needs doing around here :)

There are still a few things i need to do in my room. I want to put up a couple more shelves and i have a couple pictures that need to be put up. I am waiting till after the weekend because Laura is coming down for the weekend and i want her advice on placement because she is artsy and cool and all that other goodnessy stuff. :)

Since i moved in two weeks ago i have barely had time to do much. I have only managed to get in about 2 hours of Playstation time. There just always seems to be something to do around here. Running a house is annoying and time consuming.

I have also been watching "So You Think You Can Dance" which i am really enjoying. It is the final this weekend but i shall be out so i will have to watch it on BBC iPlayer a few days later. Of the two boys in the final i think Tommy is the better dancer but i really like Robbies enthusiasm and he WANTS it so bad. His Solo in the semi's was awesome and showed it.

Of the two girls I really like Charlie she is sexy (especially after the routine in the semi's) She has improved a lot, However i think Lizzie is the better dancer. She doesn't stand out as much as Charlie but she is always consistent with all the styles she is given. Who do i want to win? I think Tommy overall. :)

I think i am done with this blog today. I really hope someone gets the song at the top :)

Its blog time

2010-02-04T17:56:00.002Z

"Theres people talking
They talk about me
They know my name
They think they know everything
But they don't know anything about me"

Today i made dinner. Stir fry. Nice and easy. It was good.

So i have now moved. I spent all weekend Unpacking, putting up shelves Organizing stuff. I'm quite impressed with my ability to get rid of crap. I am getting rid of half my books, Practically all my DVD's. Only keeping the TV series. I would get rid of them but it seems wasteful. I may have to put a list of the tv shows i have and give them away. I also kept about a dozen Films.

My room is cool. Its really nice not having the computer in there. One annoying thing about having the computer downstairs in the study is that i can no longer look at the more 'Questionable content' i like :)

So its been great, i have been going to bed when i get tired, which has been quite early the past few days.

Work is going well. All in all life is pretty good at the moment. Wonder how i'll screw it up ;-)

Also name that tune.

<3

I wish you...

2010-01-26T21:31:00.004Z

I have been very bad with this blog of late.

I have been pretty damn busy the laste few weeks but still i should always be able to find 10 mins to blog. I find enough time to make a video every Friday.

So well what have i been up to i hear you ask. You did ask right? :)

Well the weekend just gone i went to Manchester to see Laura and we had a pretty good weekend just hanging out. We talked a lot. She taught me about era's in english history. So i now feel smarter :)
It is a 4 hour drive to manchester and it is very tiring, i got back on Sunday and had to do a little packing and stuff. All this week i have been moving stuff from where i currently live (My nans) to my house. It is actually my house to. Well it will be when the paperwork actually goes through. When i have been talking to people lately i have been taling about being all domestic and how much i am looking forward to cooking cleaning and also i have been talking about furniture and all sorts of crap :)

Its an important part of my life, buying a house. I will likely be there for a good long while. Its a nice house. I plan to be all moved in by the end of this weekend. I also pretty much have the next two months of weekends booked up now to. I like being busy. Work hard, play hard is how i like to think of it. All the things i am doing involve visiting people and being awesome, so i think i win at life for that :)

Sidenote: I plan on making a collagy wall thingy with photos of people in it because i have seen a few peoples ones and they are awesome. Its all about rememebering the good times and i would love to have something like that on my wall that i could look at each morning and think "This is why i am going to work so i can go see these people" :)

Peace <3

First day at work

2010-01-18T23:33:00.002Z

Today was my first day back at work, I have pretty much been off for the last month.
After the two week christmas break i was in for 2 days then had nearly two weeks off with sickness. :( Today was very trying at work and i know im still not 100% better but i need to get back into the swing of things.

This weekend i am going to Manchester to see Laura which will be awesome im sure. (yay for this feeling like a bullet point blog...sorry i mean nay)

Ok so im just gonna type some shit now.

Im clearing out
Im moving on
To a place where i can finally start my life
The bins are full of junk i no longer, and never needed
I have plans for my new life
They involve very little things and many experiences and memories
Last year was very similar but with no place i could call home
I bought little and experienced lots
I have decided to have photos on my walls
I never have photos
I want to remember everything and everyone
I want to do more
I want to do more in my own back garden
I have some really nice clothes i never wear
Im gonna improve my cooking
Im gonna start having breakfast and reading more
Im intelligent...i have also decided i am actually not the bad looking. i'd say an 8 average
It changes on a day to day basis
I can be funny on occasion
My head is getting big :)
I just ordered geeky technical cables for being awesome in my new home.

Ok im done with this blog post it is getting dull i can tell :)

Last year

2010-01-05T20:38:00.003Z

Was probably the best year of my life.

I did so many things, highlights of which include.

Walking around the Ben Lomond Mountain around 3am with three of the best people i know.
Going to the top of a mountain, above the clouds and looking at the stars with a very dear friend.
Drove 8 hours to see friends for about 5 hours then drove 8 hours back.
Had my first experience of a beach party.
Drove to Edinburgh and back (TWICE!!) with some amazing people.
Beat Christie at Scrabble :)
Went to all the UK Wizard Rock Shows!!
Sat up talking till 6am with Justine about UK politics and the NHS.
Travelled to the Wrockstock with Lauren :)
Spent a great day and evening hanging out with awesome people at Summer In The City
Got very badly drunk twice (not a highlight but something noteworthy :)
Wrote a fair bit of poetry
Had an awesome drunk skype call with two of my very favourite people.
Was part of a group of 400 people that invaded a Subways. Point of note Zachery Levi made me a Subway that day :)
Bought an awesome gift for someone i barely knew who i now consider a very dear friend.
Blogged 133 times
Rewired a friends house (and didn't burn it down lol)
Sitting in a nice hostel in Edinburgh listening to people play the piano in the morning.
Hanging out in London with Jonny for a whole day gossiping :)
Crawling around in combats shooting paintballs at people.
Attempting and failing NANOWRIMO.
Watching The Labyrinth and The Princess Bride on the big screen
Had a rollercoaster year with regards to romance. (I class this as a good thing, i learnt lots)

I also met Sooooo many new and amazing people! Also properly met people i met before :) I won't list because there are so many of you im bound to forget someone :)

I went to so many new places at home and abroad!!

Lets see if 2010 can do better, i must say its getting off to a fantastic start <3

I'm smiling

2010-01-04T21:58:00.002Z

Its gonna be a great year :)

20122015112012201115201220

2009-12-30T00:30:00.002Z

A night of misconceptions and confusion

An unkindled and owned flame I wish to ignite

A call I hope goes unanswered just so I can hear your voice

Some tethered passion that needs to be loosed

A love that went down a different path

A moment of passion never to be forgotten

A night of nearly, instead I found friendship

We had fun then I screwed up

I’m confused, I’m holding back, I don’t want to.

You intimidate me too much for me to ask

You seem to be discovering yourself and im not sure you have room in your life.

You seem right in so many ways

The Snow Ball

2009-12-21T18:45:00.004Z

It was amazing!

A couple days before some plans got changed and Alex and Emma decided to Join me, Zoe G and Zoe B on the road trip up to Scotland. The Riddle family invited Emma, Alex and I to stay at their house on the Thursday night so that we had less to travel in the morning.

We got there and they had made us some fantastic food. We didn't get there till 10 so we ended up staying up talking till around 1am at which point despite wanting to stay up with everyone i had to say goodnight as i had to be up at 530 to start the road trip to pick the Zoes up.

In the morning when we had picked the zoes up we stopped at a garage to fill up and me, Emma and Alex decided to try one of those new energy shots. It was disgusting. The road trip was awesome and im glad we had the addition of Emma and Alex. It still would have been awesome but its always more fun with more people.

We got to Edinburgh and checked in and i had THE BEST surprise ever!!! Seriously the best!!! Christie was checked into the hostel!! I saw her name on the register and asked if she had called and asked for it to be there for lols but she was actually there!!!

So i started this two days ago now im carrying on :)

So awesomeness was had the snow ball was awesome! Met lots of new people. Danced to the Remus Lupins. The ball was full of lots of moments were you just grabbed your friends and swayed/hu8gged it out. Notable points include Sonorus. When amy played this she had asked people before to come on stage and sing the chorus with her. I was standing next to Christie and Lauren at the time and just grabbed them both and it was awesome. Also with For Jo pretty much the same thing,

Siriusly Hazza P's set was absolutely amazing! Cathrin and Laura were just brilliant. They never fail to get the crowd going. They have dance routines and back them up with brilliant songs. They just get better and better and they were great the first time i saw them. The black sisters played first and despite the fact they never really had any time to rehearse as they are all far apart their set was still pretty good and they even managed to learn a duet with The Remus Lupins in a bout ten minutes prior to the show. Riddle TM were brilliant as usual, I feel any complimentary comment i can give them will sound cliched and overused because they are always brilliant. :) Amys set was beautiful. Alex's set was a great way to end the band lineup. Full of rocking out. After Alex's actual set the bands all went back on stage and sang a few HatP songs which was pretty awesome.

Later on was the raffle and Neil asked for a volunteer. I was excited and volunteered :) I picked the first prize for someone and then kinda stole the sock of tickets and started going round the crowd and getting the audience involved. There were a lot of prizes at the snow ball. Its great so many people donated prizes. We had shirts, Signed CD's, micelaneous and awesome merch. Unique posters, Mugs and lots of other awesome stuff.

After the show most of us went back to the hostel and hung out for a few hours. The majority of the people were sitting around singing and such. I was there for a while then went and sat at the other end of the common area. It was a little quieter. I had a nice long conversation with Zoe G, it was awesome to get to know her more. I think thats pretty much Friday night.

Saturday we spent the morning in the posh common area. It had a piano!! It was really nice. Riddle TM were playing around on the piano for like an hour. then went Ice Skating which was pretty fun. Then when we headed on we were going to go to the museum and it started snowing. I mean it started really snowing, Snow storm style. We had to climb over a gate and then we went back to the hostel to warm up. We never made iot to the museum. Then we went to the pub near the hostel and pretty much spent lots of hours in there. I think eventually we ended up back at the hostel and spent the rest of the evening in there hanging out and such. I spoke to Zoe B a bit that night. Then we got to know the staff quite well too.

Sunday was the road trip back and we hit the road about 12 and we dropped both the Zoes back about 19:30 and then i dropped Emma and Alex back at Emmas around 22:00 the whole road trip was again pretty awesome. We listened to some pretty cool music. Stopped at the farm shop again.

Now im home and have been working two days and i miss everyone and want to justr jump in my car and drive to where people are!!

<3 everyone

Answers

2009-12-16T21:16:00.002Z

Things i referenced in my last post.

Songs: Uncle Kevin by...someone *shrugs*

Films: Saw, Grease, Never Ending Story, X-Men, Spiderman, James Bond, Ghost Busters, Shrek

TV Shows: Dark Angel, Firefly, Gilmore Girls, Doctor Who, Charmed, How I Met You Mother, Friends, Ghost Whisperer, Scrubs, Alias, NCIS, Firefly (again),

Books: Harry Potter, The Death Gate Cycle, Lord Of The Rings.

Comics: Questionable Content

Lets play a game, you be the patient, i'll be the doctor. Do you wanna go to Kent?

2009-12-14T18:17:00.003Z

Im referencing lots of things today and i want you to guess what im referencing.

"I am a genetically created Wizard. I wear a long browncoat and a blue t-shirt with a regularly used misspelt word on it. I was raised in Star's Hollow on Gallifrey. I attended school at Rydell High. I am The child of a whitelighter and a witch. I am covered from head to toe with tattoos that give me protection and power. I have a Luck Dragon that takes me places. I much prefer socializing in Mcclarens than Central Perk. Sometimes ghosts seek me out to help them move on to there final resting place. I used to work in Sacred Heart hospital but there were too many ghosts. I now work for SD6 under the tutorlige of Agent Gibb. Our biggest Operation was in Serenity Valley. We lost some good people that day. Jean Grey, Peter Parker, James Bond, Dr Egon Spengler and our most decorated agent Princess Fiona. Anyway that is all i have to prep for my next assignment in Mordor."

Yes i have nothing better to do :D
The title is also a reference to something ;-)
Heck my tweet was even a reference, Im just that awesome!! :D

Dreaming

2009-12-14T00:40:00.002Z

I am about to go to sleep and i have decided that tonight my dream is going to involve the following things

Fairy Dust
5 Headed Dragons
Boats
Ink
Drinking Games
Friendship Bracelets (Preferably attached to some of my good friends)
A Horseshoe
A litre of Ice Cream
Escalators
Jewel Staite
And for the ladies Chad Micheal Murray

Good night all :D

A feel like writing a poem

2009-12-13T21:19:00.002Z

I just wrote a whole thing but deleted it. It was very depressing. The thing is i am not depressed at the moment. I actually feel ok, not great but not sad. I would describe my state of mind as Vulcan in its existance. (i just watched Star Trek).

I have plenty to feel sad about and i do on occasion. I also have a lot to be happy about. So lets go with what i am happy about.

I am buying a house, this is a direct result of a sad thing so there is some guilt involved about my happiness of the silver lining.

I am moving on. I have been for a while. With one slight hiccup at Wrockstock. drinkaware.co.uk

I have an awesome trip planned next weelend. I am very excited to be going to Edinburgh to the UK Yule "Snow" Ball. I am driving up on Friday with Zoe and Zoe (that should be a fun trip). Then the whole weekend with some of my very favourite people in the world. I am helping out during the show. I am very happy to be involved (even if only in a small way) I honestly had my doubts about the whole thing but you have no idea how glad i am that i have been proven wrong. Neil is an aweome wizard who i shall never doubt again!!

Christmas is soon. Now i am not a christmas person in any way shape or form but i am excited about the holiday break. Mainly because its 2 weeks off of work.

Pay rise in January! Will be very helpful with the aforementioned property purchase.

Harmonica's in Wizard Rock bands sounds fucking awesome!

Run down of the last few days

2009-12-08T20:27:00.003Z

I have been so busy in the last 3-4 days. I have barely even tweeted!

My mum went away for the weekend so i stayed there on thursday and friday night. It was nice to just get home from work and not have to have some completely alone time. I don't get it very often.

I spent most of Friday night thinking of questions to ask people on formspring. Its quite good i enjoy just asking my friends stupid, random, occasionally thought provoking questions. Some people say that the whole formspring thing is egotistical and people just fanning themselves. I think some people just over think things. Its just some fun.

Saturday i went to the airport to pick up Neil. We had planned to spend the day in London but that didn't happen. In the end we watched Firefly. We watched about 6 episodes. We had Pizza and beer and just hung out. I slept for a fair chunk of it.

Sunday we went to London and hung out with wizards. Amy was there. Also the Riddle's, Siriusly Hazza P, Chloe and Kevin from Basilisk in your Pasta. We went to a bar and had some food. They had these really cool coasters that they gave you when you ordered food. They flashed and vibrated when your food was ready. they were pretty cool. Then SHP had to leave and we went to the Science Museum. It was pretty cool i decided to play around with the electrical interactive displays. I totally kicked their ass :D

Then the Riddles had to go and Neil, Amy and i went to a pub and had a good catch up while Chloe went back to her place to study for a test the next day. Chloe came back after about an hour and it was really nice to get to know her in a smaller group.

Me and Neil then began the long journey home. Getting back around 23:30. we watched another episode of Firefly and then i went to sleep because i had to be up for work 4 hours later :)

The next day i went to work early and Neil went home. After work i went to london to pick up Amy after her audition which went really well by all accounts :) I really hope she gets it because then she will move to london and we can hang out more.

We went back to Windsor and had something to eat then came back and spent a few hours browsing on youtube and hanging out. The next morning Amy made me irish sausages and bacon. It was deliciuous and makes me wanna get up every morning and cook a proper breakfast.

I'll probably wake up and just go back to sleep for twenty minutes lol.

Amy then went to the airport and i went to work. Tonight i am at my mums just chillin which is nice because the last 4 days have been very busy with people staying and what not :)

Why I Blog

2009-12-02T20:00:00.000Z

I really felt the need to do a blog. Not sure why just did. I guess i haven't done one in like 4 days and if i leave it too long i will stop. I don't want to stop.

I went through the list of draft blog posts i have. IE ones i start but don't publish. I usually use the draft function for ideas that are less diary like. Ones that aren't about what i am/have been doing. Anyway a few weeks ago when i wrote a somewhat negative blog, i made the draft entitled "Why i blog".

At the time, the original post i had written was something i wasn't sure i should post. As i thought about it, with the cursor resting on the publish button....No idea why i felt the need to add imagery into this post :)

So yeah, my thought process was that on occasion i do go back and read older posts i have written. I often find that when reading them back at a later date they read a lot better then i would expect of myself. I also find when reading older posts that it helps me remember some of the things i have done and felt over the last year or so since i started. I mean i remember the big things, but its the little things in life that make it great and i want to remember them. For example, i remember when i used to play Scrabble with Christie every Tuesday and Thursday night. I had however forgot the first time i beat her, or the first bingo (using all 7 tiles in one go) i got. Or even the time i opened the game with a bingo. Luckily these little snippets of my life are now recorded in this blog and while i will not feel as elated (bonus points for that bitch!!) as i did when these things actually happened, just reading abouyt them makes me smile.

With reagards to the fact i published the blog where i was feeling low (You're asking which one right? :D ) I still felt i should publish it because the person i am today is made up not only of the good times i have experienced but also the bad times. The hangovers, the broken hearts, the family dramas, all of it contributes to who i am.
I like who i am. I think im a (somewhat) well adjusted adult (HAHAHA yeah right :) Sure im still gonna make mistakes and not get everything right. (if you're interested in seeing what i fuck up next click the follow button :) But i think my heart is in the right place and i pretty much have my head screwed on.

So in a nutshell i write this blog for myself. (you should still click the follow button anyway though ;-)

Feel free to join me for the ride!

New Moon

2009-11-29T20:09:00.003Z

This weekend i went to Oxford to hang out with a friend and we ended up watching New Moon.

I was most interested to see what all the fuss was about the guy who plays Jacob Black. The film started and i must say i didn't think much of Jacob at all. I think it was mostly the long hair it totally didn't suit him in my opinion. I think some guys can pull of long hair. The best example of which would be Toby from The Remus Lupins. As for Jacob as a character i thought he was pretty cool. Just reckless enough to be fun but not to stupid.

After his change he looked so much better with short hair and i can see why the girls swoon. I can't say i think he was absolutely gorgeous or anything. He obviously had the muscles going for him but other then that i didn't really see it. I still liked his character though.

As for the actual film well all the werewolf stuff was freaking awesome. Loved when they did the changing in mid air and the werewolf fighting and such. All the Edward and lovey dovey stuff got boring pretty quick though.

Basically take the two main characters out and you've got yourself a decent film :)

Also i thought the Volturi were pretty damn cool and my main hope is that when they make the fourth book they change the ending so there is a decent battle because that would be one of the best fight scenes ever.

Obviously the Hogwarts final battle hasn't been done yet...even so i think a fight between Vampires with special powers VS other vamps with powers and a huge pack of werewolfs will probably still be a better action sequence.

I just remembered the final battle will have huge spiders, Giants, Suits of armour and such... Wow i can't wait to see these two battle scenes.

:D

Things I keep meaning to do/get back into

2009-11-25T19:55:00.005Z

Youtube

I haven't made a video in like 7 months! There is talk of a collab channel i may be part of next year. While i never hold out much hope for collab channels. I actually think i and the people involved in it will very likely stick to it.

Kapilands

This is an online business game i started playing about 3 years ago. Its pretty good. I kind off lost track of it after a year or so but every now and then i log in and spend five minutes starting a research or something. I really like this game because i have made an EPIC spreadsheet for it. I mean seriously some of the formulas in it are rather intense. Im really proud of it (NERD!!!)(damn straight :-).

Torn City

This is a gangsta game again i started playing this around the same time as the one above and the game is never ending and constantly being upgraded. I spent a lot of time on this once upon a time and the account is still active. Again i log in now and then to keep it that way. Id like to get back into this at some point.

Read

Oh god i have so much i need to read. I still haven't read Sally's Knightsen book. I have about a dozen (At least, very likely more) books on my shelf i need to crack open.

Write more letters

I want to start writing letters regularly. I did a bunch after Wrockstock and i liked actually writing people letters. Plus it also has the added bonus of (hopefully) improving my handwriting.

Re-Organize my hard drives

I have so much stuff on my computer. I have a total of 2,760GB of disk space (including External Hard Drives) I have lots of stuff i record of TV. I want to reorganize all the TV stuff i have so its all episode names and such. At some point i would also like to edit the adverts out of them. Which i have the program for but it takes a while and i seriously have so much. All friends episodes and Veronica Mars...far too much to list.

Do a full inventory of everything i own

Yeah this is kind off a big project. Probably do this when i move. Like seriously im gonna inventorise (is that a word?) EVERYTHING!!

Do a car boot sale

I want to sell all my dvds and old books and such. (probably give the books to a library or something) I looked at selling DVDs on Ebay but it doesnt even seem worth it. I should make a list and give them to people at the snow ball if they want them :) for free. Seeing as i cant get anyone anything this year. It could be you guys' presents.

Finish computer games

I have SO MANY computer games that i bought that i never really played. HBP, Fallout 3 etc etc. What i need is the inability to do anything. Oh i know having no money to do anything would work. What a coinky dink. Im gonna be poor very very soon.

Work out all my finances

I really need to sit down and make a spreadsheet (I like my spreadsheets :) Something i can edit each day and keep a running track of everything i spend.

Make Hardcopys of all my music

I have lots of the CDs but some that i bought of iTunes or procured via other means i would really like to make hardcopys off so i have them as backups.

Scrabble

Christie got me into this and i enjoyed it a lot. I havent played a game in a good 4 months.

Super Secret Awesome Project With Lauren

CLASSIFIED!!!

Paint

By paint i mean paint the little warhammer figure things i have. I used to paint them when i was younger (well sporadically) (I should totally get bonus points for using sporadically in a sentance) I painted them quite well if i do say so myself :D

Write more poems

I have written quite a few, all of which can be found on Tailcast. some were posted much later after they were written because well they were too personal at the time off writing. I don't class myself as a poet or anything but i found it was a good way to express myself even if no one saw them at the time.

Write about and/or play with my Firefly crew i made

I have an awesome crew i made, i think they will have some great storylines the characters have lots of ...well character. :) In fact i think im probably gonna start writing up indepth bios and Historys for them at this Sundays NaNoWriMo Write in. While i am no longer doing NaNoWriMo i want to go and hang out with the people. They were really cool.

Blog...oh wait this one i actually do :)

Lets end this blog on a win :D

Lucky Bastard

2009-11-25T19:14:00.003Z

You have no idea how lucky i was today. I was putting up a bell box (for the intruder alarm) and i got off the ladders to get a screw out of the van. It was a very windy day...can you see where this is going :)

Yeah the ladders got blown over. They slide along thetiles to the left and landed in the neighbours garden. The top of the ladder was about 2 inchs from the wall. The wall has a window that starts a few feet up for a few feet. If i had extended the ladders just one more rung and they had blown over...SMASH!!!. Yes i got lucky no one even knew :)

My life since the last post has been fairly standard. Oh i know, i went round my dads on Sunday. Me and my sister went. My step mum was away for the weekend so i think my dad was really looking forward to hanging out with all his kids for the weekend. we arrived at 2 and she came back about 230 :(. I don't think she was due back till late.
There was some tension in the air. I was in the process of making my sister a coffee when she came in and i wasn't sure if i should offer to make her one. I didn't.

Me and my sister stayed for a few hours (Like 4) We all watched Night At The Museum 2 which was pretty good. I spent some time playing video games with my 12 year old brother. Im gonna miss doing things like that when he is gone. My youngest brother (3) was hilarious and fun tp play with. Plus my sister bought my niece (6 Months Old) round.

Tuesday i went round my sisters for dinner. We had Fajitas which are my most very favourite meal :). My Mum came round too and my dad even turned up at one point. It was quite funny at one point Me, My Dad, My Mum and my sister and Niece were sitting at the table. Don't get me wrong i don't ever expect anything of the sort to ever happen. It was just a funny picture...

We live in a society where an actual family having dinner is a funny picture...interesting.

My family has some very interesting dynamics. Ill discuss them sometime.

I think thats it for today.

Feeling a might lonely

2009-11-21T23:51:00.002Z

Ok so this is a bad blog IE im gonna whine and bitch a little.

Tonight i felt very lonely. I was surrounded by family and it sucks because i know they love me and i DO love them. It was my cousins 21st birthday i also knew about half the attendess from school and the like. The thing is i dont KNOW them...Its late and i can't be assed to finish tyhis. Basically I'm just feeling pretty alone atm, its probably post wrockstock depression. I just felt out of place...In a room full of family and people i know.

On a sidenote i never say the right thing. I try to help but sometimes i think people misinterpret my intentions. I'm sorry. Texting is a lame way to convey a message, you don't get all the body language and such that is a vital part of human interaction.

I have been reassessing what i do wrong with people the last few days and i really want to kick myself for fucking things up with these people.

I also really need to get laid. Im playing the im a man and can be vulger card once in a while. :)

Pre-Sunday blog

2009-11-21T18:19:00.001Z

Off out for my cousins 21st. Im still in my never drinking agaion phase lol

Real blog tomorrow i think.

That is all.

Everybodys Story Review

2009-11-17T23:01:00.002Z

I posted this on iTunes and figured i may as well get a blog post out of it :)

This blog is like a diary and sometimes i go back and read old stuff. Its a good way to remind myself of good times. Also bad times but its all my history. its the things and events that make me who i am. Wow im rambling, anyway this is what i thought of this album at this time. In a few years i may read this and be like OMG i loved that album and dig it out for listen.

I first heard the title track for this album on the artists You-tube channel. I immediately fell in love with the song. it’s a heart wrenching song about unrequited love. We have all been there and everyone can relate. it’s a piano piece and you can feel the emotion projected in Lena’s voice. I bought the album on that basis alone knowing I would like at least enough songs to make the purchase worthwhile. I got the CD and had a listen through and was amazed by the whole thing. Lena uses all kinds of instruments on the CD. Its predominantly guitar and Piano but many other instruments are involved.

“Autobiography” always makes me smile. “Repeat” is about growth and realization. “Everybody’s Story” which is the title track is so powerful. It makes me cry on a regular basis. “I Can” Is a good song. “Another Life” is one that shows Lena’s ability to spread her talent across genres. It is an amazing track that seems to swing more towards modern pop/RnB styles. “Chocoholic” is a fun song about well chocolate. I’m listening to it now and I could imagine it being performed on stage as part of a show. Just a random thought. “Why Isn’t There Me” Is another song that is very powerful. Also a piano piece, it is very soft and is about longing for someone. “Paranoid” Rises and falls very nicely. “Mirror Mirror” Is one of my favourites on the CD It is performed on a ukulele and is a lovely piece about the true meaning being beautiful. “Bus To Nowhere” starts of soft with an apology. It has some amazing imagery. This is another song were you can feel the emotion from the artist. One of the best on the CD. “Straightjacket” Is another one that rises and falls very nicely. The shortest track on the album but powerful in its content about losing someone.

This CD is one of the best CD’s I have bought this year. The whole CD was written and produced and all that Jazz by Lena. It is worth every penny and I expect big things from the artist.

PS I know jack about music terminology and such. I may have used them in the wrong context lol

Music and Firefly RPG

2009-11-16T19:13:00.003Z

Well hello there....

That was lame :) Work went pretty well today. My phone decided it didn't want reception at all this morning. I only realised at about 11:30 so i switched off and on. Apperently everyone at work had been trying to get hold of me. To the point were they phoned up my mum. They were worried. Not that i gave them any reason to be. I went to my first couple jobs. They went fine. i was eating...well i guess it was brunch :) and i restarted my phone. Ten minutes later i got a call "where are you?" etc etc. I was like. "erm on my way to **** job" in a confused tone. I thought i was doing pretty well at hiding how down i have been lately apperently not.

I'm actually pretty peppy right now. Its been a great evening for music. The Dailey Wrocket (sorry i don't know how to link things and am to lazy to find out, do a search ;-)) Featured Oliver Boyd And The Rememberalls today. So i went on a bit of a nostalgia trip with that. <3 end of an era so much. Then Muggle music monday featured Antsy Pants from the Juno soundtrack. Amazing kids do amazing shit!. :) :) Need i say more. I think thats gonna be somewhat of a wizard rock moto now. I am aware of the irony that Dinah posts both of those articles lol.

ALSO i did a review of Everybodys story on iTunes, which of course meant listening to the whole album again. Between these i have been listening to various mellow tunes all evening. Despite my choice of heat wrenching music this evening i am feeling jazzed. I just love music and am enjoying the awesome creativity and such.

Im determined to spend the rest of the eveneing creating at least one more firefly RPG character. Im tempted to do my captain but im finding the more i do the other crew the better picture i have of the captain. so far i have done.,

Lex, female, 17, a reader. She is mute though, except when she is having painful raging fits. She is a natural with engines. She appears to have a crush on Jimmy.

Jimmy, Male, 15, arful dodger type character. small and agile. not a fighter, stealthy. Physically abused as a child. Stowed away on board. earnt his place. Will be a great pilot one day. Has more to learn. Honourable. Idolizes the captain. Always smiling.

Chen Male 40 something. Ships Mechanic. Loyaltie is to the ship not the captain. Heavy drinker. sexist. loner. good brawler. Never leaves the ship. dislikes everyone. the feeling is usually returned or people just ignore him either way is fine by him.

Other characters i have mentioned in the sheets are. Max who had to restrain jimmy once. Im thinking a female fighter type. I also mention a slave that the captain bought once to appease a client. I think this male slave would have become the ships doctor :)
Lex has people after her naturally.

so i have a mechanic. a captain (unwritten) a doctor (unwritten) a fighter type (unwritten) a doctor (unwritten) The captain will be the primary pilot and jimmy will be a backup. Lex is the cook and generally housekeeping of the ship i guess. assit the doctor and such. I think thats pretty much all i need. and of course i have to write the ship history. I all ready know which ship i am using. :) Its from one of the books i bought, its not a firefly and it has an interesting story. well i think it will be.

NoNaNoWriMo

2009-11-12T17:21:00.003Z

I really can't deal with the stress of this at the moment. I am allready way behind because of Wrockstock anyway.

I have to focus on work 100% at the moment. I have family issues in my life i am dealing with. This is all on top of outstanding Wrockstock issues that im really worried about. I don't even know what i did and im afraid to find out. My biggest concern is that i have hurt people i truly care for. Im too scared to find out how though. At the end of the day i'm not sure it matters what i did. I hurt them and even just a little is something i never wanted to do.

What emotionally stable person drinks 19 shots in 6 hours? No one. I remember doing the first 5 in one go. I was by myself. I really don't know what happened that night. I think i just let the weight of all my problems get to me. Then i felt guilty because i KNOW i have it pretty good. Then i wanted to stop thinking. Unfortunantly i had watched 'The Pineapple Incident' episode of HIMYM several days earlier. The one in where Ted does 5 shots and can't remember anything past the 4th shot. Sadly real life is not a sitcom. My night did not go anything like Teds night.

I have snippets of Sunday. I remember doing some shots with several people i remember talking to a few people. I remember smoking a cigarette. I don't even smoke. I remember getting the Remus Lupin award. I remember Mallory and Suze looking after me. For which i owe them so much <3. I also know my other friends would also have been there to help me if these 2 weren't around so i thank you all. <3

As for what i said I do not remember and i know i have often said to people that i have never forgot anything while drinking. I have also never ever passed out from alchohol.
I beleive from the limited amount of discussion the next morning that most of what i said was things i know, personal things, that aren't anyone elses business. I broke peoples trust that night. I also beleive i exagerrated certain stories and bent the truth a little. I probably came across as arrogant and a pig. I do that a little when sober because i think its funny and the people who really know me know im not like that.

I am not trying to blame what i did on Alchohol or on problems i had before that night. I am just trying to explain a little. I accept i am a douche. I have lots of bridges to build. Some may be irrepairable.

Thats all i can really say on the matter of Sunday. My body has still not recovered. Karma has been kicking me in the balls all week. I really need to get some sleep. Im gutted i didnt get to see The Mudblood show or experience the bonfire. The singalong sounded amazing! Im extremly gutted i didn't get to say goodbye to some of my closest friends on Monday morning.

Ok im done

<3 James

Karma is a bitch plus some wrockstock stuff

2009-11-11T20:18:00.003Z

Just like Facebook i have no idea what to write in here. I could talk about Wrockstock but i feel like it would be best not to. I could talk about how Karma is kicking me in the ass right now but you don't wanna hear that. I don't wanna hear it!

Good parts of Wrockstock.

THE FREAKING MUSIC!! Yeah it was amazing! The bands live are awesome. I only went to Lena's set on Saturday in the Wampum Willow and it was lovely to hear some of my favourite songs ever being performed live. I was really worried about her playing Everybodys Story. Its such a sad song and i do get emotional when i hear it but it was awesome and i was just enjoying watching Lena play it too much.

On Sunday i decided to hang out there all day and im glad i did. The blibbering Humdingers opened up at 9am and were a great kick off to the day. I must give a shut out to Standing In Line over at myspace.com/standingmusic she was amazing and just my kind of music. Nancy of The Half Kneazles was up at 12:30 and i was really looking forward to hearing her. She had a couple lovely songs and i bought her CD. I really like the Power 'Puff Boys song.

I have the best friends in the world and was so grateful for them this weekend. I really don't deserve them. I really and truly love them all so freaking much.

I'm gonna do everything in my power to make it next year!!

NANO DAY 1

2009-11-01T21:49:00.000Z

Chapter One

A candle without a wick
Wood without a flame
The potential to be so much more
But the reality of what you are

How shall I move forward? It is a question I would spend days dwelling over. How do I further my career? How do I make the friend more then a friend? I would often wait for things to happen. I knew I needed to make things happen. I needed to push myself to get the results I wanted.

The defining moment, the point when something in my life changed was so small and insignificant it hardly seems worth mentioning. There was no death experience, no sudden flash of my life 40 years from now if I didn’t change. It was like waking up.

No one ever knows the exact point they wake up. One minute you’re asleep the next your making a cup of tea.

It was a simple summer day. It could have been any day. No earth shattering news events happened. The sun rose, the neighbours springer spaniel barked as I walked passed their front door. Just like every morning. The moment I woke up I was on the tube of all places. I had some headphones in listening to a song I can’t even remember. It was background noise not meant to be listened to but meant to be heard to supplement the mundanity of my situation. It added a little colour. The passenger opposite me was reading a book. I don’t recall what the book was called but the cover had a picture of an asteroid hitting the earth.

I didn’t think “what if that was to happen what have I not done yet?” There was no assesment of who I would call and tell I loved. I simply understood I needed to wake up.

My life wasn’t so bad I had a good job that paid the bills and allowed me to go out once in a while. I enjoyed my job, however I never pushed the boundaries of what I could do. I was comfortable with what I was doing and was content in playing the underappreciated employee.
My friends were many and I would always be invited to parties and social engagements. Again I was content with my group of friends and never really felt the need to put any effort into new friendships. I had been at my job for 2 years and didn’t have a single friend in the office. Sure I had work colleagues but I never sociallised with them past the water cooler.

The very first thing I did when I woke up was take out my headphones. I looked around me at the people on the tube. I saw the man opposite me. He was an older man maybe in his 50’s. I found this strange because I never really noticed old people reading books on the tube before. I mean you see people reading books all the time, but 90% of the time its young women that read in public.

I counted the rest of the people in the carriage. 17 people in all. A family of four caught my attention for a few minutes. A man, his wife and their two children. Both girls about 10 and 6 maybe. As the parents were engrossed in conversation I saw the little kid smack the big kid and vice versa. The big kid got caught. This made me smile because I remember doing this to my brother all the time. It always seems to be that the older child gets caught. I played on this natural phenomenon for years as a child.

Further along the train I caught a glimpse of a beautiful women. Being a red blooded male and…well in my current state it doesn’t really matter what your opinion is of me, I had a good eyeful before she casual looked my way and I shifted my eyes elsewhere.

Next just by chance they happen to fall on a seat two to the left. A seat occupied by John. John Is a guy from my office who I have been working with for the last year. John is effectively the office bitch. He is a nice guy and pretty charismatic he draws smiles from all the staff. He just doesn’t have much in terms of experience and qualifications. He is average height, weight and moderately good looking. You wouldn’t be surprised to find him with a beautiful women on his arm but you would ask how he managed to swing that one.

I found myself wondering if he got this tube every day and if he knows I get the same one. I could very simply ignore that I have seen him and melt back into my seat. He hasn’t seen that I have seen him. I get up and start walking along the speckled blue green floor. It kind off looks like someone has just got a big box of confetti and thrown it in the air.

Not once does he look up. I suspect he knows I am coming over though. I wonder if I should back off, maybe he wants to be left alone. I decide something somewhere in the middle. I sit opposite him but also one to the side. I figure that is a good position for him to ignore me but also makes me accessible if he does want to make small talk.

This is where my well thought out plan comes apart as I lower myself into the seat there is the sound of metal upon metal. The buzz of spinning coins and bounce of those that fell the right way to bounce.

John reaches out for a coin and looks up from his sitting position. He hands me the 20 pence piece and his eyes show a sign of recognition.

“Hi, Simon” He says as he removes his own headphones.

“Hey” I’m still a little distracted trying to scope up the remaining coins. A few coins are handed to me by strangers. Including the gorgeous women who gives me a sweet smile. I can’t help smiling back.

“Hey Lisa, thanks my friends a little skittish” I silently curse John for his ability to insult me but still make me like him. I also let it slide because he appears to know the pretty lady.

“No trouble” She smiles at John, it’s a different smile then the one I received, but its one I know well. It’s the polite smile that says we are friends and your nice but I’m not interested in you.

“This is Simon, he works for me” A lie. Not one I intend to challenge for the simple reason that the truth always comes out.

“Nice to meet you Simon” She reaches out her hand and I smile at her as I take it.

Chapter Two

As summer dies
Autumn begins

Seeds will be blown
To be born in Spring

To rise up towards the sky
In times of change.

I remember meeting Lisa so vividly. With her subtle auburn coloured hair that flowed down around her shoulder ending at the top of her breast. She wore simple jeans that molded to her body and showed of her curves. Some sexy boots, I can think of no other way to describe them. A plain white shirt with a red and gold tie and a simple black waistcoat. She had a healthy body, what I mean by that is she wasn’t a size zero.

After we all said hi on the tube we arrived at Lisa’s stop and she said her goodbyes and left. This left me with John. We still had another good 10 minutes of small talk to make.

“What were you listening to?” I ask and its clear from Johns expression it wasn’t the question he was expecting.

“Err black eyed peas” He replies “I’ve seen you on here before but wasn’t sure if you like your alone time on journeys. Some people do” As he says this I realise hes right, some people do, I did. I wonder if this is a small hint not to bother him again. Today we are forced to make small talk. We have been introduced it’s the polite thing to do. I make a mental note not to bother him again.

We make several minutes of small talk, discussing the weather, some office gossip. He tells me of the relationship between the new temp on reception and the boss. Scandalous. How he knows these things im not sure. I would assume the women in the office tell him. They are the source of many a rumour. Some are true, most are false I decide to take this one with a pinch of salt. Our boss is married and while the girl on reception is attractive enough I can’t see how she would be worth losing a marriage over.

As the train pulls in I make the excuse I need to use the loo and John should go ahead and I will see him in the office. I hold back but instead I stop at the kiosk and pick up a bottle of water. I normally buy an energy drink just to boost me a little bit. I find the caffeine rush is useful. However today I am awake and I know I will not need it.

As I step onto the escalator I decide, rather then just letting the escalator carry me up, to walk as well. It carrys us straight out of the ground and into the sun. it’s a sunny day but its still chilly. Summer hasn’t quite grasped hold of itself yet. I start walking down the people lined street. it’s a sea of heads bobbing up and down. Many wearing headphones, drowning out the world around them as they continue to their destinations. The walk without my headphones is very different. Yesterday I would have been meandering in and out of the crowd heading where I needed to go without even thinking about it. Today things don’t go as well. I am more aware of people so as I walk I am thinking to far ahead im seeing someone 5 yards away and plotting a course around them. People walk between us, they overtake us. My course changes. We nearly collide as we both sidestep the same direction to avoid each other. If I had been in autopilot I am pretty confident this wouldn’t have happened.

“I’m sorry” I say as I move round my would be collider. I hear nothing in return as I begin to move away. This is kindof in direct contrast to the people who helped me pick up coins on the train. I guess it’s easier to ignore a situation if you are moving away from it. These thoughts put me back into autopilot and I reach my building in one piece.

The building I work in is pretty small. It just has two floors. The ground floor is taken up by the local newspaper. I have never been in there. The next floor is our floor it’s a very simple open plan office with one enclosed meeting room and a small server room out back. There is also the lobby area which has a front desk and a sitting area supposedly for visitors to either company. Currently it is occupied by John and several other employess from the office. I walk up to the front desk and sign in.

The girl on the front desk hands me my security badge and wishes me a nice day. I realise I don’t even know her name. She isn’t wearing a badge either. For some reason I feel the need to know her name. She is an attractive girl, around 20. She is very slim. Too slim in my opinion. She is wearing a grey jumper with yellow strips running across the breast. I can’t see the bottom half of her outfit but she has short hair down to just above her shoulders. Blonde in colour and clearly expertly groomed. She has little make up but the stuff she does have is very well applied. This is a girl who is very conscious of her appearance. I think you should know the names of people in your life. I think how I would love to live back in a time when everyone knew everyone. When the population wasn’t so vast it became impossible.

“Thanks, Forgive me I’m terrible with names, good with faces, terrible with names”
I give her a reassuring smile and wait expectantly. To my surprise she actually stands up and offers out her hand.

“Hi Simon, I’m Tracey, I’ve been here 6 months.” She says it with such sweetnes, but the public standing up that drew peoples attention and the subtle addition of the 6 months are a clear sign that I have just commited a faux pas of sorts. I decide to persevere.

“Well good to finally know your name I have been meaning to ask you for a while. I guess today you seemed more approachable” I play off the shy guy perfectly and her face blushes a little. “Well have fun and I shall bump into you later I’m sure” I walk away and noticce John looking over. I catch his eye, say hi and proceed up the stqars to start another day.

Chapter Three

A cog in the machine
The smallest of parts
Drives the line

The line may end
If the cog stops turning
The cog can be replaced

The day mostly passes by slowly. I try hard to make small talk with the people in the cubicles around me. there is Micheal on my right and Simon on my left. I often wonder why they put the only other simon in the company in the cubicle next to mine. It makes things a little annoying when someone says Simon and we always both look up. I notice they have personal items in there cubicles. Pictures of children, or in Simons case nieces.

Micheal also has a little music setup, a pretty impressive ipod speaker dock, it currently has headphone cables sticking out of it. I wonder why he bothers having an actual dock and just doesn’t plug the headphones in the ipod.

Me and Simon have a nice talk about the upcoming Wimbledon tournament. He seems to be routing for Federer while I maintain some national pride and voice my support for Andy Murray. Micheal on the other hand is clearly a music fanatic. Its hard to grab his attention. He clearly zones out to music and is pretty much dead to the world. When I do get some response it is in the form of a discussion on the current top 10. None of which I have any idea of.

When my phone rings I am welcome for the excuse to pull away from the conversation. As I lift the receiver I see headphones going in and that is the very first and last time I speak to Michael.

The day is filled with phone calls and e-mails. Data checker and cross checking. it’s a pretty mundane job but every once in a while we will get a project to do and those are pretty fun.

At the end of the day I clock out and leave the building, I have had no further contact with either John or Tracey. Today is not the day for furthering those relationships it seems. I get the usual tube home and I look around just out of curiosity as to whether this tube is also shared by John. It isn’t. I can’t help feeling a little pleased about that.

As I arrive home I think about how I came to live where I do. I never looked for this place. It sort of found me. About a year ago I was still living at home. It didn’t concern me living at home. I was happy there I got on well with my parents. I was tidy neat and self contained. I paid my way via rent. Of course it was cheaper then the real world but I was a contributer. I had space and well it was a pretty tight setup. So one weekend my friend calls me and asks me to go house hunting with him. He was in a similar spot to me but his parents were decidedly less cool. We looked around several places and my place was one of them. My friend didn’t really like that it was in a tower block. I however thought it was a good thing. I mean sure they have there reputations but it was cheap, it was clean and best of all it was near a tube station that went straight to where I worked.

I actually convinced my friend to live there with me. It was a two bedroom apartment. Both bedrooms were on different floors. It had a very strange layout. But the layout was a nice feature I thought it separated the rooms more and offered more privacy.
We moved in about 2 weeks later, he did all the paperwork so it wasn’t even like it was in anyway stressful to move. It just sort of happened. The way most things in my life do.

I have no idea what I did that evening but I remember the dream I had that night. It was vivid. It felt all too real.

A dark space surrounds me, there is no..anything. No breeze, no background noise, no light of any kind. I can’t even see my hand in front of me. I try to say something. Callout but no sound breaks the dead silence. It feels like I am shouting, my throat muscles tell me I am making noise from the pain they have after several minutes. I try something different. I can feel a hard surface beneath my bare feet. I drop to my kness and feel my way along the floor. My sense piece together something at least. From touch I conclude that I am standing on a disc shaped object no more than a metre in diameter. As I reach over the side I feel nothing. It appears to be suspended in mid air. All of a sudden I hear a voice it’s a familiar voice but I can’t place it.

“You need to find Simon” it’s said in a simple yet authoritive tone. I am being gven an order. Its not like a military man giving a soldier an order its like a boss would give an order to an employee. Not aggressive but just said matter of factly.

I try to tell the voice that I am here. But again no words part my lips. All of a sudden I get a flash of a face. it’s a face I recognise but not in the way it is shown to me. I see my friends face, the guy I was living with. Its covered in blood. A swollen lip and a bloody nose suggest he has been in a fight of some description. Its worse then that. I don’t know how I know but I just know that the image shown to me is one of death.

Chapter Four

I know the sun will rise
I know the seeds will grow
I know many things are destined

The sun doesn’t rise for 40 days
The drought ends life
I know nothing is destined

The next few days are just average days I don’t have any specific conversations with people. Work is just work I get home and I spend the hours doing a mixture of reading and watching crappy b-movies on the TV. I Don’t even remember the dream at this point. That comes later. I don’t see Lisa and have nothing but general water cooler babble with the other people in my life. As Friday roles around I wake up late and in my haste to catch the tube. I end up going the wrong way on the line.

What a good weekend!!

2009-11-01T20:02:00.002Z

So practically 30 mins after my last post. I somehow found myself on the nanowrimo website. Thinking back im fdairly certain i was there due to reading Kristinas blog so you can all go thank her for the utter trit you may or may not read below. :)

I was on the website i read the FAqs and such but i hadn't decided to do it. I was more just looking then anything. I then saw the HayleyGHoover video about Nanowirmo and i figured well if all the cool kids are doing it lol.

So i signed up joined my region and looked on the forums. At this point i hadn't announced to anyone i was going to do it. I found out that there were writ ins and that there was a kick-off party right by Waterloo on Saturday. I was gonna be in London on saturday allready for a youtube gathering so i figured it would be really simple to just slope off for a couple hours and meet some Nano's. I also figured that going to the meeting would encourage me to actually follow through with it. I RSVP yes to the meeting.

At this point i had no idea what i was going to write about i literally hadn't given any thought to the story.

That was Thursday night. Friday i worked and on my way home i got a call form my friend Donna. She spent a good 30 mins trying to convince me to go late night shopping with her in Reading. I did indeed cave in the end. So we went. I had no intention of buying anything. Except some stationary i would really love to actually write some letters to people. I allready promised i would write Maria a letter. That was months ago and i still havn't done it. Naturally we went into lots of clothes shops. I saw a jacket that i feel in love with but it was £80. I really couldn't justify spending that much. So we shopped some more. I did however see some really nice smart/casual jeans in H&M. These i could justify buying because i only have like two pairs of half decent jeans.

I ended up buying two pairs of jeans and a nice scarfe I also found a jacket i really like in primark for £20. All of these things i could justify buying. I only have a winter jacket and the new one is more of an autumn/ spring jacket. Its also much cooler :)

I managed to get an early night on friday about 10ish. I had a hair appointment on Saturday. Any of you that are regular to this blog may recognise this next sentance. They wash my hair at the hairdressers and OMG it feels so so nice. Having a pretty girl massage shampoo into my head is so nice. Its one of the only reasons i go back there. I could go somewhere else and pay half. But the cut wouldn't be as good and i wouldn't get the nice hair wash. Also i never had an appointment that early and its so much better early in the morning. Its like sex that way.

After that i went round my sisters to see her and my niece who i haven't seen for a few months. She's adorable and my sister showed me a pumpkin outft she got her for halloween. It was also really nice to see my sister again. After this i went home and got a cab to the train station where i then went into london for the youtube gathering. I was kinda nervous about this one. I think i mentioned it in a blog. I got there and kind off stuck to Jonny for a while. As more people came. People i have meet many times i found myself being really awkward about going up to them and saying hi. I mean they know me and i know them but i still had some social anxiety around them. I was just having an off day i think.

At one point on the tube to camden i nearly got off at leicester square to go home. I felt out of place so much. I had lost Jonny at this point. We got to camden and walked around for a bit. I was talking to Chris Lomasca a bit. I like him. I don't know why but he knows my last name which i found very nice. Hes in the in crowd. as are most of the people i actually know. I think its mostly that im a regular at the gatherings that most people at least know off me. Thats all they know though. Mostly. A few of them i would consider friends. Lex, Hatti, Paul most definantly.
A few others but these are the front runners. I was just picking Youtube peopel there. Me and Jonny are pretty close. Heck anyone who is a wizard i seem to be pretty damn close with.

So anyway i was feeling out of place and decided to leave for the Nanwrimo kick off party earlier then i thought i would. I got to the meeting and was so nervous going in. I didn't know anyone, and it had allready started. I walked in said hi and promptly went to the back of the group. I started talking to the people around me about Nano stuff and it went really well i had a great time and meet some lovely people. Four of us decided to go get pizza around 630ish. Me, Daniel, Thomas and Sarah. We went to pizza express and ate talked about books movies and all sorts. I really felt comfortable around them. More comfortable then i did around the people at the youtube gathering. It was a little strange but toatlly awesome. While we were eating pizza Sarah asked "Have you heard of Harry and the Potters?" The next ten minutes were spent with me mostly talking about Wizard Rock, Wrockstock, The Pedia and british Wrcok bands. I mentioned the Snow Ball too. It was nice to talk about something i knew a lot about. Probably made me come off as more confident then i actually am. It was such a good night. When we left the 4 of us spent 30 mins walking around the tate modern. that was really nteresting. I had never been in there before. Then Daniel had to leave and Sarahs heels were killing her so i may have a bit too eagerly suggested that we swap shoes. I was wearing trainers. I was also wearing hello kitty socks :) I spent the next 15 mins walking in heels. Then they were annoying so i spent the next 20 mins walking around with no shows on along the river. I got home around 1130 and decided to wait till midnight because i was all pumped for nanwrimo. I wrote for an hour reaching just over a thousand words. Then i slept and wrote another hours worth in the morning. Then work then i decided to go round my mums for the afternoon. It was a good idea because y two step sisters were their and i haven't seen them in a while either. I also stole my mums laptop because i wish to take it with me to america for Nanowrimo.

I then came home and wrote another hours worth. and now im writing this ridiculously long blog post. I had a lot tell about this weekend :) It was avery good weekend and went much better then i had anticipated.

OK so I will post my Story in another post shortly. Hope you all had a good first Wrimo day and a great weekend xxx

busy weekend

2009-10-31T07:48:00.002Z

I have such a busy weekend this weekend. This is a good thing but to be honest im kind off dreading it. Today i am getting my haircut. No problem there. Then i am going to London for a youtube gathering. I enjoy these things but i get socially anxious at them. I get this way because while i know people and they know me. I'm still not part of any group. I feel uncomfortable going up and joining in on peoples conversations. When we break for lunch i don't know who to go with.

I don't think anyone minds if i come with them but i don't really feel like they are all that concerned. Last time at SITC i had Jerry and Emma's group to latch onto. To be honest i even felt uncomfortable attaching myself to them at SitC. Luckily that faded pretty quickly. That group isn't gonna be there today.

I do get on really well with Paul. I'm not sure if he is going.
I'm just rambling im sure ill be fine :)

I also have a group meeting to go to halfway through the gathering. Luckily its close by. Then back to the gathering and then home BEFORE the last train leaves lol.

Tomorrow i am working on my friends house. Probably for about 5 hours. Then i can't really do anymore till the kitchen gets pushed forward a little.

Busy busy busy.

I bought some new clothes yesterday and i think im gonna look awesome today with the new hair and clothes :) That should help me with the confidence thing., :D

2009-10-29T17:33:00.001Z

Its been one of those days. You know the kind that you don't really remember anything specific because absolutely nothing has happened. Now im home and...well thats it im home. I have no plans.

I'm feeling a bit down, by a bit i mean a lot. It's a combination of Tiredness (so so tired) and missing people. I actually, despite being ridiculously tired, feel the need to get out and do something.

I was never one of those young adults that went out on Thursday and Sunday nights. I was always...I can't be bothered to write this anymore.

Lots of Lukes.

2009-10-27T23:07:00.000Z

A couple days ago, on twitter, someone posted a link to a video that Luke Conrad made for Kristina Horner. It was a pretty awesome video/song. Very sweet, cute and from the comments had all the girls swooning. I agree that it was a very special thing that Luke did. It is a great way to put your feelings out there.

Now, i don't mean to take away from the impact that Luke's video has. But it got me thinking about all the guys out there that don't have the talent to do this kind of thing. Does that make them (and by them i clearly mean us lol) any less worthy of someones attention.

Ok i just got distracted by Amy and OMG i am so looking forward to the Snow Ball right now.
I just want to say. I love music. I love being with friends. I wish i could see you all everyday!!.

So back to the post. So yes some people can't sing, can't write songs, don't have camera presence. What are these people supposed to do to show people they care? I wrack my brains but think of nothing. All i can do to show how i feel is be there for them. Do the little things that make relationships work. Really listen. Drive 2 hours just to hang out with them. Send flowers randomly. Look after them when they are sick etc etc etc.

I would love to have the talent to make a video like lukes. To do something creative for someone i like. My skills just dont lie in those areas.

I kind of lost where i was going with this but im gonna post it anyway.

I don't know what Kristinas thoughts on the video were but whatever happens i wish them both luck. Again i would like to say that Lukes video was lovely and i don't mean to bring it down or anything.

I just had a thought. Its like Luke in the Gilmore Girls. For years he was just her friend. He always wanted more and he showed he cared by being there and doing things for her. Fixing fences and such. Thats how he showed he cared. Now it took them like 5 years before Lorelai finally SAW him and that was a tv show. In the real world i wonder if Lorelai would ever have seen Luke.
Chris whisks Lorelai away to Paris (again a lovely thing) but does that make him a better man then Luke?

I think that last paragraoh explained things better then the rest of the post.

PS: Whats with all the Lukes in todays post?

I got shot in the head.

2009-10-25T20:03:00.002Z

I have had a ying yang weekend.

My mum was away for the weekend so i decided to stay at theres. It was really nice. I got to sleep in my own bed (i left it there when i moved out because i dont have room here) and i got to take a proper bath. (the one here is really realy small)

Friday night i went round there and stayed up till about 12 playing fallout 3 on the PS3. Its been a good while since i had a good console session. I then decided to read myself to sleep with The Hunger Games. Big mistake. Needless to say i was up at 4am crying my eyes out. I eventually drifted off around 430ish.

My alarm went off at 6am!! Ok so i actually set it for 6am but still. :) The reason i had to be up at 6am was because i was going paintballing with a few friends for a birthday. I had to be at theres for 7am and we had to drive down to Southampton for 9am.
The last time i went paintballing was about 3 years ago for my cousins birthday. We played a few different games including capture the flag. A village one and we played the 'storming the castle' one twice. Everyone that turned up got split into the red or the blue team. I was on the blue team. When the first game started i thought we would do ok because we had more players on our team that had the belts with extra ammo. So i just assumed they would be pretty good. Everyone else basically just had what was in our guns. We got our asses kicked. In every game.

In the first game the guy was explaining the rules. Two members from our team were going to be VIP's and the other team has to shoot them before we shoot theirs. Two girls from our team volunteered to be VIP's.

After the first game they wanted to bail. We all just laughed because they thought they would have it easy. But of course they were the main targets. They may aswell have worn high vis jackets that said shoot me. Took us a good deal of persuading to make them play again.

When we were defending the castle me and my friend where up in the tower part and we had the north west corner. the people on the south west corner just hid the whole game. So naturally we were taking fire from behind. They were supposed to be covering that part. I got kinda annoyed. This is were i got shot in the head.
We have to wear the helmet google things all the time but they dont cover the top of your head.I now have a large lump on my head. I got shot lots of other times over the course of the day. I personally didn't think it hurts. I mean it stings a little when you actually get shot but its nothing really. Unless you get shot from really close up. The site we were on enforced a 20ft rule.

it was really fun and during the last few games i was crawling around the forest floor, it was raining. I got soaked. I loved it :). I also put my hand in a lovely batch of stinging nettles too. Still itches now 30 hours later.

When i got back to my mum's i had the best 2 hour bath ever. Not only was it good because it was a proper bath, with bubbles :) But i also finished 'The Hunger Games' It was a brilliant book.
I then ordered a pizza and watched 'The day the earth stood still' that also was a pretty good movie. Then i played Fallout 3 for a few more hours and fell asleep on the sofa around 10.
I vaguely recall waking up arouund 3am and moving to the floor because the couch was uncomfortable. I always seem to sleep pretty well on floors.

Today i haven't really done anything. i got up and tidied my mess up at my mums then went into town with my little brother. Not one bookshop in Windsor had Catching Fire!! When i got home i ordered a copy online and spent the day doing laundry and also organizing my TV libary thing.
I really need to make a list of all the films i have on my computer so i can just tweet people to tell me what to watch :)

I really need to get an early night tonight. I sense tomorrow is gonna be a bitch at work.

Infinitus programming.

2009-10-20T21:42:00.003+01:00

Today i received an email from infinitus 2010. It was asking for people to submit programming proposals. The general theme for infinitus, "Imagine the infinite possibilities", Is a rather fitting theme. From what i am aware this is the last announced conference that the HPEF is putting together.

It will be interesting to see what possibilities there are for cons post Infinitus. I personally think that Leaky 2011 will be one of the main ones that year, assuming the HPEF doesn't announce one. Even if they do it will be interesting to see which one attracts more people. From what i surmize having been to both this year, is that both cons, while having the same basic format and theme, do offer different things. Leaky was (for me anyway) much more about partying and hanging with friends. The programming seemed a bit more casual and played more to the wizard rock and commuinty side of the fandom. Azkatraz while having the above, was focused more on Harry Potter analysis and issues and things we can learn from it.

I enjoyed both conferences very much (personal issues aside). I honestly didn't look at any programming before Leaky or Azkatraz, however i still found myself attending programming everyday.

Anyway onto one of the things i wanted to discuss before i got sidetracked on the Leaky/HPEF cons.

So the theme is "Imagine the infinite possibilities". I was thinking about Harry Potters longevity.
On Sunday me and Jonny met at platform 9 and 3 quarters. It wasn't a special day or anything but there was still plenty of people taking photos and messing around by the sign at king's cross. I also have been considering how Harry Potter hooked me in, a full 5 films in and with all books released. I had obviously heard of Harry Potter before and knew it was a big deal. I never really thought about it much past that. I would see people reading the books on the train and to be honest never really gave it any thought. As far as i was concerned it was just a book. I didn't hate on those reading it and i didn't question why they were reading it.

In July '07 (I was 23) when the 5th film came out we, as a family, went to see Order Of The Pheonix. I had seen the others before but not actually sat and watched them properly. I enjoyed the film and the very next day i went and bought the first two books. I then, over the course of the next month, read all 7 of them. I didn't get spoiled for anything because Harry Potter isn't exactly a subject that ever comes up in the circles i was in at the time.

So i read the books and that was it. I hide them away and moved on. Then in summer 2008 i joined youtube and i discovered wizard rock and the community. I had never searched online for anything HP related before because i never knew how big it was. I went to my first Wrock show on October the 18 2008 and you pretty much know the rest.

I keep getting sidetracked. My point of that little flashback was that i became a new fan at the age of 23 after all the hype. There must be plenty more people out there like me. before and after getting "into" HP.

I think a discussion on HP's ability to attract new fans and keep fans interested would be a rather interesting topic. I beleive there are fans from all walks of life in the community. From all types of careers. Clearly it attracts people of the "nerd" nature predominantly, but i think it attracts all. A discussion on why it attracts people and what keeps us around would be interesting. Maybe present a couple case studies of people who aren't your typical Potter fans and discuss why they are here and what keeps them around.

I was on a building site recently and this builder guy asked me what i was listening too and i told him about Wrock. He said he loved Harry Potter and we discussed it several times over the following weeks. He was genuine too he knew the next gen names and some other stuff. We started randomly firing HP questions at each other occasionly. This guy was 38 married with two kids and was a carpenter. I just found it interesting that HP appeals to someone like him, i wouldn't have pictured it. I expected him to take the piss when i mentioned Wizard Rock (like he did when i answered the same question with Lindsey Lohan a few days previous) :)

Anyway so that is something I think would be an interesting discussion for Infinitus. :)

Yesterday was a special day...

2009-10-19T21:07:00.000+01:00

...but i was too lazy to do this yesterday.

Yesterday was a whole year since my first wizard rock show. Its been a pretty intense year. I met several of my closest friends that day. I mean its only been a year and its quite amazing how integrated in my life these people are.

I'm not really sure what else to write. I was gonna do a massive one about things i have done in the past year but to be honest i kinda can't be bothered to go through it all again.

Basically my First year in Wizard Rock has been the best year of my life and i regret none of it. The friends i made that day and the friends i made since are amazing and I'm lucky to call you all such.

I'm really excited that my second year pretty much kicks off with Wrockstock. Its gonna be a much less hectic year. (unless i do get talked into infinitus) See some of you people in a couple weeks <3

Busy busy busy.

2009-10-13T17:23:00.002+01:00

It's been a couple hectic days for me. After the non existance of the weekend, by that i mean i did nothing worth mentioning, The last two days at work have been pretty busy. We are cutting in loads of downlighters and removing wall lights and chasing sockets. Its all Hard work. Its also good though. I find that this sort of work is like a project and i love my projects :)

Today i set myself an amount of work i wanted to get done. I got the work done but one of the connections for the new socket was connected into the wrong circuit. I didn't have the bits i needed to fix it so i have to spend an hour tomorrow in the Lounge. I left feeling annoyed because i wanted to get completely out of the lounge so i could just get stuck into the next room tomorrow. I wanted to put a nail in that particular part of the job so to speak.

Fallout 3 on the PS3 is a really good game. I bought it when it came out and was annoyed to find that the add-ons for it were not going to be released on the PS3 version. This wasn like a year ago. On Friday the Game Of The Year edition comes out and it will include all 5 add-ons which is great but it means i will have two copies of the game. Anyway i fully plan on being out of action for a little while next week. I would probably spend the majority of the weekend playing it but i have plans this weekend.

I got a text earlier from a friend asking if i wanted to go out with them on Friday night so that should be a lot of fun. Then Saturday I am going to birmingham to hang out with some wizard friends :) So far i think its going to be me, Gary, Laura, cathrin and Ellie. Man im gonna feel old lol. One good thing is i plan on using the girls to help me find some Wrockstock costumes.

Sunday is the London HP meet and I'm not sure whos coming to that, I will be there anyway. David and Jonny said they were gonna come. So It will be nice to see them even if it is just us we can bond some. Oh, Zoe who i haven't met yet says she is hoping to make it. She is also going to Wrockstock to so it would be cool to get to know her pre-wrockstock in a less hectic setting.
So yeah a busy weekend for me, just the way i like it :)

Weird Dream

2009-10-11T09:52:00.002+01:00

Had a weird dream last night. I was in Chico and went to see the Rocky Horror performance. Then afterwards me, Tim, Lauren and other people i don't rememeber Went for a 20 minute walk to the top of a mountain. We hung out for several hours. Then i went back to Dinah's dads place where i was staying.

In the morning i went downstairs, climbed over the lava flow that runs through the staircase and Was telling Dinah about my night when her dad came in and basically asked me to leave because i was out late. It was a very civil discussion where i explained that i am 25 and on holiday and i don't have a curfew. Anyway I basically had to leave so spent the day driving around looking for a hotel.

Thats the dream. A few problems. One im fairly certain there are no mountains within 20 mins off Chico, Dinahs dad doesn't live in Chico, I've never met him either so I would imagine he wouldn't act like that. As for the Lava flow thats just strange.

Today is laundry day. Also im thinking about actually playing my PS3 i haven't played it in months! TBH i probably should never have bought it lol.

Lots of TV

2009-10-08T22:42:00.003+01:00

Today i watched a lot of TV. I record lots of things of the telly straight onto my computer and file them away in case i get bored. Lets get back to that subject in a bit.

Since Sunday i seem to have been adjusting my diet a little. I was out for a family meal and i decided to just have a water because i just didn't fancy a coke. I was driving so alchohol was out of the question. I also only had a starter because i wasn't very hungry. This was weird for me. Since Sunday I have, other then my daily morning Relentless, been drinking only water. Ok i lie i had a beer tonight aswell. I just seem to have gone off fizzy drinks. I don't know why, i just look at the bottles in the shop and would rather just have a water. I've also been a lot better with how much i have been eating. I have been buying smaller lunches at work.

I just got sidetracked by The Snow Ball. We have a friday night hostel booked and i need a saturday night one booked so i am just trying to see who else needs a bed for saturday night.
I don't know how i managed to get put in charge of it. :)

Anyway so...Im eating and drinking a little better.

Back to the tv part of this blog. Tonight i watched a lot of tv. I watched todays episode of Veronica mars. then i watched Gilmore girls and it was freaking hilarious. It was the first one that had Jess in it. Sidenote Jess>Dean. Anyway Luke pushed Jess in the lake and it was the funniest thing ever!! I had completely forgotten about it. Which was great because i had the full effect of the hilarity again!

Then i watched 2 episodes of Doctor who. The fires of pompei and planet of the ood. I teared up a little at a few scenes. It gets quite emotional really. Next up was Scrubs. Scrubs is so funny! JD looks weird with the stubble.

So at one point while i was watching scrubs i was laughing so hard...then i instantly switched to sad mode. It was really weird like i was practically howling with laughter. I collapsed into my pillow and then BOOM! i sank faster then a man with an elephant wieghted to his ankles.
Reason. My Social bar is at about 2%

People tell me things, important things.

I actually can't wait till wrockstock its going to be amazing! I was thinking earlier and im actually gonna know quite a few people. Its gonna be a little daunting. I was also thinking at how i will be arriving surrounded by 5 women. lol I don't how it happens :D Im doing horseback riding for the first time in my life and am very excited about it. Its 9am on Saturday so i can't get to bad on friday night. Im also doing the nature walk on Sunday at 11 which will be really nice especially seeing as a few of my friends have the same time as me so it will be cool to spend some time with them.

I need a thing

2009-10-06T19:17:00.002+01:00

For some strange reason i'm in a good mood. And i'm blogging. Weird.

Anyway i'm at my mum's just hanging out waiting till 8 because the new series of Stargate is on. Yes i like Sci-Fi. I listened to the get psyched mix from "How I Met Your Mother" for the first time in a long time today. It really works and picked me right up. Which reminds me i need to catch up on the new series.

Work has been really busy. Its good though. I like working hard. Makes me feel like i've earnt everything i get. Unfortunantly it doesn't work the same with people, Sometimes you have to back off. I'm a pro-active person so sitting around doing nothing doesn't work very well for me. I am trying to work on it :)

I don't think i mentioned it on here yet but i bought a car the other day. It's a 2.4 Volvo Estate. A nice car. A big car. Good for long journeys, i will be using it to drive to "The Snow Ball".

PS I love knee/thigh high socks, so damn sexy :)

I feel like i should have something in my blog everyday.....Sims bars??

Fun 60%
Bladder 20%
Hygiene 40%
Social 60%
Hunger 95%
Sleep 40%

Movie/Game/Book review each post??

"Take The Lead" Film

This is a film about a ballroom dancer who teaches a dance class at an inner city school. Its based on a real person called Pierre DuLaine. I may have spelt that wrong. The students he has are the trouble makers of the school. Anyway you can probably guess the storyline its a fairly common one. I really like some of the dances in the film. The three person Tango at the end is so HAWT!! lol Its probably not a film i will buy or just watch again. I didn't feel like i wasted my time and i would watch it again if someone else wanted to watch it.

Countdowns??

Wrockstock---31 days
Snow Ball---73 days
Christmas---80 days

Daily money spent??

£8.67

Any other suggestions?

A room with a view.

2009-10-03T19:56:00.003+01:00

Some advice i got. "If nothing happens straight away it's unlikely"

While im hopeful this isn't true. I think it probably is. Which kinda sucks but at least i have a new friend. :)

You never know maybe things might change but i don't plan on ruining this friendship. I ruined one this summer and i do not want to ever repeat that. When i say I ruined it. More accurately that should say we.

As for this new friendship I'm excited to have someone near me that wants to hang out on occasion.
(man that sounded more pathetic then my life actually is lol)
We went to the supermarket, made angel delight, watched youtube videos. curled up together on the sofa to tv and just hung out. If thats what this friendship consists of im happy :)

Bit lonely right now though lol

Also feel free to give me your thoughts on the advice i got :)

Friends

2009-09-29T06:48:00.002+01:00

I am going through my friends list in another window and am gonna see of the 170 people i know how many i know through youtube and HP. Should be interesting :)

Because of youtube i know 43 people
Because of HP i know 57 people

The hp number would be higher but some people in the HP community i met through Youtube first so i put them there. Example: The 5AG and more importantly Gary Kirk who incidentally was the reason i started going to HP events.

Not sure of the point of this blog just felt like finding out the above information.

That is all.

Today

2009-09-26T18:36:00.002+01:00

Today i worked on my friends house. We worked from 9 till 6 i could tell he was looking to go a bit earlier but i was in the zone :) I spent the day crawling around lofts sticking my arm under floorboards. Getting covered in dust and dirt. At the end of the day though we achieved a lot and it feels pretty good to accomplish things. I was thinking about things again at work.

I will never be famous, i will never be rich. I worked very hard today and i enjoyed it. I won't be getting much money for it, friends rates and all that. Im never gonna be someone everyone wants to know. I will however, always work hard. I will always be there for my friends and family. I will always have enough money for what i need. My trade is a pretty good one and i will always be employed. I won't ever be going out to fancy restaurants on a regular basis, once in a while i will :) I Enjoy the simpler things in life. I don't need big fancy cars or homes. Im a fairly simple man to be honest. Doesn't mean i won't surprise people sometimes though.

Tonight after work i had THE. BEST. SHOWER. EVER! There is nothing better then working hard all day and jumping in a nice hot shower. Okay maybe a couple things ;-)

Im at my mums tonight she has gone away for the weekend. Im sitting here abusing her internet and watching the big TV. She has a wii with like a hundread games too. Id much rather be going out and doing something to be honest though. basically if im staying in doing nothing this is the best place for it.

I think i try to hard to be friends with people sometimes. Especially when there live near me and they show some interest in being friends. I tend to try to hard and end up pushing them away. I need to work on that. This is why im home alone on saturday night.

Im probably gonna spend tonight watching the HP musical and drinking. As for tomorrow i have no idea what im doing. Most likely just go home and do laundry what a fun life i lead. :(

A weird non structured blog.

2009-09-24T22:25:00.003+01:00

Today after work i just sat in my car for 4 hours. I was parked at a garage near my office. I basically sat there and listened to a few albums and went into the garage a couple times to get a drink and food. Why was i sitting in my car for four hours you ask? well that is something i don't really wish to discuss. i was being hopefully foolish :)

I had a lot of time to think. It was pretty good. I thought about why things have been going well lately. Work has been going really well. I think its because things outside of work are going well and it clearly is seeping into my work :) Last week i did lots of stuff and saw lots of people.

I Spent some time with Emma on Sunday and Wednesday. The weekend was choc full of awesomeness. I went out on Friday night into Windsor for my friends birthday. I had only planned to go out for a few hours but it was fun. I ended up drinking dancing and getting 3 hours sleep, then going to work on Saturday.
I had such a productive day too which i didnt think i would. Straight from work i had a 2 hour drive to Bath to hang out with Sophie. She had moved into her new house where she will be for the next 3 years for uni. We watched Brokeback mountain and went to a bar. The next day the rest of the housemates showed up and we helped them move in. They seem really nice and Jess got really excited when i mentioned the Harry Potter musical. I left around 3pm to drive home and chilled for the rest of the day.

I think i have changed a bit lately. Not anything major but i think i am a lot more confident then i used to be. I was out last weekend with non-hp people and i somehow ended up talking about the fandom and wrock. Also i was helping some people move into a house on Sunday and again bought up the subject. I have never talked about it with people outside the fandom before.

The events of this summer had more of an impact on me then i thought. I take social rejection much better now and am still shit scared of putting myself out there but i am doing it more these days.

I feel better about the way i look, act and the person i am as a whole. I'm not taking things personally anymore. People are busy and i need to stop overthinking everything, im making good progress with this :)

Quotes

2009-09-21T18:19:00.004+01:00

Yesterday i posted a quote to Facebook and twitter. The quote was

"Don't make someone a priority in your life who only sees you as an option in theirs."

At the time i thought this was a brilliant quote and something i need to adhere to more then i do. I was feeling a little down because i had a good weekend and it was over and i have no other actual plans till late October. Anyway today i have been thinking about it a bit and while i still have no plans as of yet and things seem shit. The above quote kinda seems like a bit of an easy way out.

It seems this to me because it makes assumptions about how others are feeling. How would you know who to apply this too? Do you really know how much someone cares or doesn't care about you? Even if your not sure, isn't it worth taking the chance?

Im not saying stalk them or anything but don't cut them out just be yourself maybe they will start to see your potential. Keep the lines of communication open and be casual. don't force it let it happen naturally. If it is meant to be it will happen. Step back chill out and don't give up. Don't over think it.

I know im kinda over thinking this quote but hey we're all flawed in some way :)

Dance blog

2009-09-20T18:45:00.002+01:00

The last few years i have been watching strictly come dancing. I'll admit i only started because the women were hot :) But i do really enjoy watching the routines aswell. Some of them are so beautiful and such. i recently went back and found a lot of old "So you think you can dance?" routines that i liked, i will link them shortly.

My favourite routines are generally the Contemorary routines. I think its because these ones are generally more intimate routines with very powerful music. I just watched the first one in the forth coming list and i teared up. I think its amazing that music dance and art can instill so much emotion in us. Last december i went to see Les Miserables and i loved it. I'm really thinking that right now i need to go to a show. I want to see people dance and sing and tell a story. I want to get suited up and have a wonderful night.

Who wants to come with me??

Anyway heres the list

Allison Ivan Contemporary

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=1808134

Dominic and Sabra contemporary

http://www.rickey.org/?p=4138

Lauren and Neil Hip Hop

http://www.rickey.org/?p=4134

Lauren and Neil Jazz

http://www.rickey.org/?p=4463

Neil and Sabra Jazz

http://www.rickey.org/?p=4804

Allison Ivan Hip Hop

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=13009009

Allison Ivan Argentine Tango

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=23228701

Heidi Travis Contemporary Won an emmy

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoID=958492234

Travis Heidi Smooth Waltz

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=2389102

Travis Heidi Afro Pop

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=2343278

Heidi Benji Mambo

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoID=998961777

Benji Heidi Salsa

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=1112607083

Group Dance Won an emmy for this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kwIwhMabIpo

Jamie Hok Jazz

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=16911228

Lauren Dominic Rumba

http://www.rickey.org/?p=4723

Danny and Neil Contemporary

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2812541602369962026#

Challenge take 2

2009-09-13T08:53:00.003+01:00

I want to play the £20 amazon game again. This time you have to pick something you think i will enjoy. It can be something silly but something you might uy me for christmas or something. :)

In other news i am hungover. I went out last night it was a pretty good night. I had a brief moment where i just missed everyone but that didn't last long :) Im really looking forward to today. I have work for a few hours then at some point this evening i shall be having a skype chat with room 730 which will be pretty awesome!

The end of Veronica Mars...for now :)

2009-09-10T21:42:00.002+01:00

Over the last few days i have been watching Veronica Mars. I have been recording it from the TV and had episodes 1.12 through to 2.20 so thats where i am with that. Now ill just have to watch the one a day that is on TV.

Its been pretty interesting to rekindle an old interest. I never actually finished the series i think i stopped watching halfway through season 3 so it will be cool to see how it all ends. They only made 3 seasons. Not sure what to do now. I need stuff to do to keep me occupied. If i get to much time to thinkk i tend to do stupid things and over analyse. These usually end up making me sad so i like to keep my brain occupied.

I kinda want to re-watch "the tribe" which was a series about a post-apocalyptic world where all the adults had died. was pretty good if i recall. I don't have the dvd's here though. I only have the first season anyway and i don't wanna buy them. I've stopped buying DVD's. It seems pointless when i can just record everything of the TV straight onto my harddrive and have everything a few clicks away :).

When i get my own place my computer is gonna be like an entertainment thing. I allready have around 250 films on here and also 8 seasons of friends and a few other things. Doctor Who, Veronica Mars, Smallville etc etc.

I'm gonna throw a car boot next time i move and get rid off so much stuff that i dont need. Mostly DVD's, CD's and books. Im also gonna do a full inventory of everything i own when i move again.

I am very tired. Good night x

Bridge to nowhere

2009-09-09T05:57:00.003+01:00

I got twitter back. This is not a good thing. Its just an extra place for me to moan.

Right now I am kinda giving up on building bridges. I feel like im the only one trying sometimes. Which makes me think whats the point. I think i have reached the point where its time to take a back seat. I have other things to worry about right now.

EDIT: So i haven't quite given up yet lol

This is a blog.

2009-09-08T16:44:00.003+01:00

Honestly I have no idea what to say anymore. I'm sick of moaning on here. I'm sick of feeling disconnected from everyone. So apparently you are gonna get a long list of things i am sick of.

I'm sick of not knowing what to say or do. I'm sick of missing people. I'm sick of sitting here trying to think of something to write for either this or on someones wall. I'm sick of feeling used. I'm sick of love. I'm sick of work. I'm sick of always being the one wanting. I'm sick of my room. I'm sick of the poxy internet its so dull now that i don't have twitter. I'm just sick of everything. Everyone thinks im so laid back but to be perfectly honest its because i don't care about anything at the moment.

The only reason i get up and go to work is pretty much because i have nothing better to do and my brain is telling me that its a good thing to have a job, and you know money. But my heart isn't in it. My heart isn't in anything at the moment. I have mood swings sometimes ill be driving home to MoM and rocking out then. not two minutes later i'll be driving along to something depressing. GGGRRRRR I don't know. I'm done.

Blah blah woof woof

2009-09-06T19:56:00.003+01:00

I have been watching Veronica Mars for the last 6 hours. I love this show. Some people are so strong willed. I mean i know its a TV show but still. So the thing that just happened is that she went to a dance with a friend who has a secret admirer and Veronica had to try and find out who it is.

She found out out it was her ex-boyfriend who she is still hung up on. She still helped get them together. Then she pre-ceeded to go cry outside but she still did it. She is very strong, i wish i was like that. I wish i could be happy that someone i cared for was happy with someone else and not me. We shall have to wait and see on that note.

It made me sad. I have been pretty good for the last few weeks. I guess everyone is allowed a bad day, once in a while.

Anyway i promised a topic yesterday and i shall deliver. So im sure most people who read this are either part of the youtube or HP community. Most of you have probably noticed that there is a very different feeling between these communities and other groups of friends.

The YT and HP communities are so much more affectionate in there expression of feeling for each other. Last weekend i was at SitC and this weekend i went to the Bristol youtube gathering. I have been to 2 overseas HP events this year and at all of these events everyone is very expressive. Everyone hugs each other and everyone is comfortable around each other (for the most part). At bristol....I can't be bothered to finish this right now. Im just not in the mood. Im gonna go watch more Veronica Mars and have a beer. Night all.

It was better then it sounds.

2009-09-05T21:58:00.004+01:00

I just got back from the Bristol youtube gathering. It was pretty fun. There was a lot less people tyhen i thought, but personally i like it like that on occassion. It gives you a chance to actually get to know the people as opposed to trying to at least say hi to everyone.

As for specifics we didn't really DO anything. Just the usual hanging out and talking. I had a nice talk with Mandy who is lovely. Gary from Cheektv was there and he was cool to talk to. Jerry was there it was nice to see him again and also meet the lovely Fawn.

A lot of people had proper cameras today. Like with huge lenses and such. A lot of random pictures got taken so that will be interesting to see on facebook over the next few days.

Anyway thats about it. I mean it was a lot better then i am making it sound but im tired. I'm meeting Shannon, who i met today, for lunch in london tomorrow.

Tomorrows topic will be somewhat more interesting and along the lines of the closeness and expresiveness of people in the community versus people IRL.

Random Thoughts.

2009-09-04T22:10:00.002+01:00

Damn i had a really good thing to talk about earlier....Nope its gone :(

I shall entertain with some random thoughts :)

Mirror Mirror.
Now i wanna talk about the subjective nature of beauty.
People i know are sexy.
I want some fun.
Bristol tomorrow.
Staying in hostel with Georgie.
Thinking about Wrock The Loch.
Miss Dinah, Christie, Lauren and Neil.
And David, stupid trains being all expensive.
Should i get the train there tomorrow.
If i drive its cheaper.
I will need to empty my van.
I don't want to empty my van.
I could have slept in the van.
Thanksgiving in York with 3 awesome people.
Sleeping in vans.
Having pretty girls cuddle up with me.
I need to change topic.
The parselmouths (calender on wall)
Kristina parselmouth is pretty and i'm jealous
Lauren Fairweather.
Wrock sexist article i read earlier.
Wizroklopedia.
Dinah
Freya
I want to meet Freya properly.
I don't think she'll like me.
People judge people before knowing them.
People judge other people on behalf of there friends.
I get that.
I miss Chelsea and am sad that i won't get to meet her or Josh because i am not going to infintus.
Room 730 :(
I miss Anna she was fun to flirt with :)
I miss Sara she was just awesome.
Mallory was a great date and Im glad we talked before so no one got confused about things.
Lena is an amazing musician. A very lovely and cool person too <3
Sally will always be in my heart <3
Maria is so cool and im glad we are friends.
I am very happy for Ian and Christie. Christie is a lucky lady ;-)
The boat.
Justine asking loaded questions without realizing. Its nice to be out of the drama i think.
Stupid HP dramas.
We all have them.
Serenity.
Firefly.
Jewel Staite.
Jewel Staite naked.....ahem sorry :)
Yawn
Need to check addresses for stuff tomorrow.
Need to go to sleep.
Need to get my ass back on tailcast and actually write something.
Thinking of writing another poem after this blog.
Which is now.

STRESSED!!!!!

2009-09-03T05:34:00.000+01:00

Work is still killing me. As such i thought i would give you a run down of the last two weeks. This is from me leaving home to getting home.

Monday 24th
5-30 to 19-00

Tuesday 25th (this would be an average day)
7-30 to 17-00

Wednesday 26th
7-15 to 18-30

Thursday 27th
7-15 to 18-30

Friday 28th
7-00 to 18-00

Saturday was the youtube gathering had like 4 hours sleep saturday night. Sunday was youtube gathering aswell. Monday was laundry and cleaning day. Also a bank holiday.

Tuesday 1st
7-00 to 17-00

Wednesday 2nd
7-00 to 18-15

Its only a 20 min drive each way to work and i can safely say that i stopped for like 30 mins tops each day. We are so busy at work its ridiculous. Didn't help the boss had a go at me on Friday after the hard work i had been doing all week. Reckons he could have got the job last wednesday finished in a day, even though i have 3 hours left there. I started there late because he slipped in a little job before. I only stopped for like 45 mins all day and most of that was driving to the office to get some bits because the alarm install was not a simple 2 zone alarm install as he said the day before. It was actually a 6 zone alarm install with 2 bell boxes!!! Another example of people not telling me the full information so i will say ill get it done.

I just feel pretty underappreciated sometimes. we only get paid 8 hours a day, even if you take away say an hour and a half for travel and breaks i have still been working my ass off.

It doesnt help when at work they try and con me into doing things. I moaned about this a few weeks back oh well. Got a call today i had to go do a service at 16:00. Thats fine but when i get there i look at the sheet and it says there is a problem that needs sorting out too. Failed to tell me that part when she said its just a service.
The boss asks me how long ill be at job today. Clearly wanting me to do something else after. He says i need to go service an alarm in London which is where i am anyway. Ok thats fine. he slips in that i need to do a reset. I catch it and ask if there is a problem there? He gets a bit shifty clearly not expecting me to have caught that. He says he thinks its just a battery. It probably is but it could well not be and he knows it. He also knows ill be starting early today. Likely leave at 6:00. I know today is gonna be a long day. And friday looking at the online diary we keep is definently gonna be a ridiculous day.

My mum just got signed off for stress for two weeks. Im very tempted to go to the doctors and do the same i honestly think i would qualify. Ive also had issues early last week i was dealing with. Its been an intense couple weeks. I need a break. I have been so tempted to just disappear. literally turn phone off and fuck off for a few days.